If You Get In Bed With My Heart, You Get In Bed With My Hurts Too
You are not
with me
If you want to be with me
be here
or get the fuck out
the woman with fangs inside my heart yells
yes
get the fuck out with all the other men who acted as if it was a burden to love me with the presence I deserved the moment I shot from the womb
I am tired from zombies walking eating my heart without paying attention
be here with me
or I’ll flick your head off
as I walk into a love where presence isn’t a burden
but a sacred gift
an effortless choice made with joy as we are living with our eyes rested wholly on each other’s hearts
I’ve had a dad who didn’t show up
a boyfriend who didn’t sell the guitar so he didn’t have money to buy a ticket to make the abortion appointment
and moms weren’t allowed in
just boyfriends
I’ve had men say
I’m coming
yet never buy a ticket
I have abandoned myself so deeply by holding space for love that isn’t love
that you are walking on fire because we do not yet have concrete and you’re only 3 toes in from where I stand
and only 10 toes in count
it isn’t rocket science
it’s heart science
and tonight you get a B minus
yes I’m hurt
of course I’m hurt
and some of these hurts aren’t yours
but if you get in bed with my heart
you get in bed with my hurts too.