Just saw an underwear ad with half naked women hanging off men that read, “For men with balls” as the marketing line.
I checked the date on my calendar and sighed.
There is so much macho man tough guy shit in the advertising world that keeps men believing they need to live a stereotype of their gender our world has out grown eons ego.
Dear men with balls,
I hope you allow yourself to be supported, because men with balls also know the value in receiving. They know receiving, unlike giving, takes the greatest strength, because it requires vulnerability.
I hope you tear down the walls you may have built around your heart from letting the world in, because we want to feel your heart, see your heart, feel your tears.
I hope you take your emotions out of the box, because nobody wants to be or love a robot.
I hope you wear whatever the fuck colour you want, and drink whatever kind of drink you wish–even if somebody calls you “girly”.
I hope that if another man ever calls you “girly” for wearing pink or drinking a bellini you are confident enough to not laugh it off even though you know it’s wrong, but call him on his shit, or say nothing–because you are at home in your choices and know being called “girly” is only an insult for those that have their heads shoved into the ground so far they can’t feel the sunlight.
I hope that when you fall, you let yourself be hurt. Be really hurt.
I hope you let yourself cry at how beautiful the sunset is, or when your heart is broken–without shame.
We all need to cry the rivers of sorrow from our bodies or they manifest as physical dis-ease and pain later on. Let it out.
I hope that when you are not too proud to be asked to be held, when you need it.
I hope that you are not too strong to ask to make love slowly.
I hope that you know that you don’t need to do this all alone, because none of us are supposed to.
I hope you watch whatever kind of shows you want, regardless of what “gender” you think they apply to.
I hope you dance ballet in pink wind up around your ankles shoes with all your might if it is what makes your heart beat the loudest.
I hope you know that men with balls, also cook their wives dinner and do the laundry.
To the media and advertising and people who are still living thinking men need to live up to the masochistic versions that we have all but retired, I hope you wake up.
I hope you raise your sons differently.
I hope you someday realize that “men with balls” wear pink, love men, listen to Adele and provide and care for their families.
I hope you someday accept your children and brothers and friends when they exist outside of the stereotypes you, or your father, or our world has built in your brain.
Most of our world is already awake to this, but obviously, some of us are still sleeping.
If you are sleeping — I wrote this for you.