If you are facing a divorce, it is best to do whatever it takes to make things amicable between you and your ex. There is no sense in dragging out the divorce proceedings and getting bitter over little things. This is just going to make you feel bitter for the rest of your life. Instead, look for ways to make the entire process easier for both of you, and there will be a lot less resentment from both sides.
Make Your Own Decisions
Obviously, it is for the best if you and your ex can work out issues, even if that means getting outside help. If you can work together, you can create a settlement that works for everyone, including custodial arrangements for children. When you can decide together on who gets what, who is the main caregiver for children, etc. you are going to be saving a lot of time, money, and aggravation. And, your children aren’t going to have to deal with a bitter divorce, which they can end up being stuck in the middle of. Once you and your ex have made all of the decisions, all that is left to do is have the divorce decree done up by the court.
When A Divorce Lawyer Is Necessary
If there have been any abuse situations in the marriage, including spousal, child, sexual, and substance abuse, it is best that you hire a divorce lawyer to make sure that children are protected from an abusive parent. If you feel that your ex is being dishonest or hateful, this is another good reason to have your own legal representation. If you can’t afford a lawyer, contact the local legal aid office to see if they can help. Or, find a lawyer who will work on a contingency basis, and doesn’t get paid until the case is settled. Learn more about services from divorce lawyers at Vario Law.
A fairly new method of divorce known as collaborative practice is becoming quite popular. Clients and their lawyers agree about not going to court. They voluntarily share information to work together to create a settlement that works for everyone. In this case, both parties must work with collaborative lawyers, and both lawyers sign an agreement that states that if they can’t settle the divorce, the couple must hire new attorneys and start all over again.
Don’t Let Lawyers Make Things Worse
While divorce lawyers are obviously working on behalf of their clients to make sure that they are being treated fairly in the divorce, some tend to get a little too aggressive. All this does is make your ex angry, and then they will get aggressive as well. This leads to arguments, and the divorce becomes that much more complicated and bitter. When interviewing potential lawyers, ask if they prefer to reach agreements in a friendly matter, or prefer to take things to court. Obviously, you want the lawyer who is going to get things done in the least aggressive manner, and avoid going to court.
What To Do when Violence Is Feared
If your ex is violent, and you fear that they may try to harm you or the children, you definitely need a lawyer. You also need to move to a place that is safe and secure, and possibly even get a restraining order. You are entitled to take half of any money in your joint accounts, so take what you need and get yourself and your children to a safe place that your ex doesn’t know about. If necessary, stay at a women’s shelter, where there are “no men allowed” policies in place.