12 (Incorrect) Assumptions Louis C.K. Made About “Fat Girls”

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KFdWcNJ17YY

All they want is some guy, ANY GUY, to just love them

A fat girl will have no discretion or standards and is constantly aware of who is her “match” when it comes to looks, because she is so obsessed with how she looks that she not only sees herself as just a body, but men as just bodies, as well. She won’t care if you’re a good guy, a kind person, a compassionate human, nope, as long as you like her, she’ll be happy.

They think lowly about themselves, so they’ll take the scraps you’ll give them

Whatever you have to give, a fat girl will take. If you’re a dick who is judgmental not just of her, but of others, she’ll forget all about that, because whatever you have to give, as long as you’re giving her something, she’ll take it.

Their entire identity is tied up in their weight

Fat girls consistently identify themselves as “fat girls” and only that. Their entire identity is wrapped up in the number on the scale and they are either delighted with life if they lose weight or they are miserable with life if they gain weight. All they care about is the scale, the size of their clothing, and, no matter what they possibly achieve, this will first and foremost be how they identify themselves to the world, as a fat girl, end of story.

They blame men for their dating problems

Fat girls will take no responsibility for their part in dating. Their poison of choice against dating woes is to blame their body and, then, blame men, as a whole, for not liking their body. They will completely forget that women of all sizes, colors, personalities, and types have their own share of dating obstacles, but nope, a fat girl will blame men completely for their problems, because they are, obviously, victims who view themselves as such.

They blame everyone and anyone for their problems, dating or otherwise

All fat girls blame the media for their self-esteem, right Louis? It’s not possible for a fat girl to take responsibility for her self-worth and self-esteem and learn to love herself regardless of what men or the media or anyone thinks of their body, right? Fat girls are not afforded the same luxury of self-love, unless they’ve earned the right to it by losing weight.

If they convince you to love them, they will be totally stoked and hold your hand

If you’re a shlub that just stands there and says nothing of value, she’ll totally take your hand if you give it to her, because obviously every fat girl just wants to convince you to fall in love with her, regardless of if you’re a cool person or if she’s attracted to you. (Fat girls aren’t allowed to be picky or even allowed to have preferences when it comes to who they want to date. They must take what they can get.)

They have no self-respect

All fat girls want to do is berate men for not liking their bodies. They have no self-respect. They will go out on a date with you even if you declined the date, because you have now changed your mind and will be seen in public with her. Most women (fat or not) would have enough self-respect to be like, “Oh, now you want to date me? Buhbye, I’m out!”

They are really, really, really upset about being fat

If you see a fat girl, chances are she’s secretly really, really, really upset about being fat. It sucks, remember? It really sucks! Come on. Give women (not just the ones who carry around extra weight) some more credit, Louis! Do you truly assume that underneath a confident exterior is really just an insecure woman who reduces her self-worth down to her weight? Is that all you see when you see a woman who doesn’t fit into your ideal? Is it hard to conceptualize that a woman can be confident if she doesn’t look like a model?

They consider themselves as part of a group of fat people and can speak to represent every person within that group

Fat girls, specifically, are homogenous and think exactly the same about men and dating and life in general. One “fat girl” can speak to how every fat girl feels and will take it upon herself to be the spokesperson for all the voiceless fat girls out there who never got to stand by a lake with a guy who was apparently super embarrassed to be seen with her. Hooray, progress!

No fat girl in the history of life has ever been wooed or pursued

Maybe you’ve been living in your fantasy version of Hollywood for too long, Louis, but out here in the real world, women of all shapes and sizes are being pursued by men of all shapes and sizes. You took something as nuanced as attraction and put it into black and white terms. Plenty of fat girls being pursued out here. Plenty of them are not. The same goes with thin girls. And girls with brown hair. And girls with dark skin. And girls with… insert literally any other physical trait here.

You clearly think you’re much more attractive than you are

Your show is not a reality show. You write parts for women you think are ideal and then you hire them, because you are on a television show that actresses in Hollywood would like to be in to advance their career. Are you dating any of these actresses or models that you write into your show? You painted a picture of Real Life, yet, actually, the role you play and the roles you have actresses play are made up and are not exactly representative of society as a whole. It is completely representative of how you think. Which, obviously, is fine, it’s your show, but don’t try to make a sweeping statement about how an entire group of women feel.

If you are not attracted to a specific fat girl, she will assume that you are judgmental and are just a terrible person that will never look twice at a fat girl

Most women, regardless of their body type, will just assume you’re not into her if you’re not into her and will not take it as some slight against every woman before and after her that even slightly looks like her or shares her same body type. If you’re not interested, we’ll move on, regardless of our body type. Plenty of fish and all that.

Probably the most groundbreaking thing Louis C.K. could have done was to date Vanessa as he would date anyone else on the show and make no mention of her weight and just show a normal relationship between two people. Now, that would have made for some interesting television.