Yes, I’m Still A Virgin — No, You’re Not Going To ‘Change My Mind’ About Wanting To Wait

Daria Nepriakhina

Finding a relationship in my generation is hard enough now lets add to you list of must haves wait for marriage that basically like lowers your choices to damn near 30% because its very rare you find a man willing to wait on a woman, especially for sex. Only 4% Of U.S adults are virgins or have engaged in anal or oral sex (which is a form of sex) and 85% of U.S adults have had sex by the age of twenty-one. Then you have the other percentage of people who have lost it after twenty-one and then you have me and the others who are still virgins.

Now imagine telling a guy that. They are usually shocked. I’m pretty sure this is the discussion they have with themselves in their head after I tell them I’m saving myself. I assume this because I’ve heard something like this many times before:

“Wow she’s a virgin!”

“Why are you waiting?”

“Bro I bet you can make her change her mind, you know make some moves on her, make her start rethinking about even waiting for marriage.”

“Yeah you right, you right its a challenge it’s like a game one I’ll except and I’m sure I can win her over.”

“Maybe I can change your mind about wanting to wait.”

I usually reply with my virginity is not a game of 2k, you’re not ever making it to playoffs, you would be lucky enough to get to the second quarter but to think you could win me over, not happening. That absolutely just pisses me off that some guys even think that way after I tell them I’m saving myself its disrespectful. Anyways, it’s not easy being a virgin in my generation I overthink and analyze everything more than I need to because I know that the guy I like or love could easily go out and get what I can’t give him from someone else. I don’t know if anyone else does this but then I start going back and forth with myself if just my personality and good looks are enough to keep a guy around. Will me being me be good enough for anyone to stay? It’s not something I want to think about but it definitely crosses my mind. I’m still learning to be confident within myself and to realize that just me alone is enough not just what I can offer physically.

A man might say he’s willing to wait and that waiting for marriage is fine and won’t be a problem but deep down I know how hard it is for a man to wait. You get temptation sometimes not even because you want to it’s just apart of being a man. Now if a man doesn’t agree with your beliefs do not try to make him change his mind he has already decided why pursue when you know he’s not the one willing to wait in the first place. You might think you can change him but in actuality you really can’t. Also, you can’t stop every woman who might offer your man what you can’t it’s always going to be someone out there who wants what you want sadly. Some ladies need to do better just saying.

Personally I chose to wait because I know I’m an very emotionally attached woman giving up something that’s so important to me, well I like to call it magical I actually call my private area a unicorn because only a magical person will enter it. Probably was too much information to share but that’s my logic and I’m sticking to it that unicorn hold’s a lot of power and emotion I

know I couldn’t mentally handle if I have it up. I chose to wait because of that sole reason not because I’m a Christian, or my parents told me so this was a choice I made on my own. A choice I made for me and no one else wait because you want to not because your forced to do so because then waiting would have no value to you if you didn’t truly want to wait in the first place. Saving yourself is something you have to decide you want to do for you and think about how it will benefit you as a person.

Now, to the people in my generation that think waiting for marriage is bull-crap and that your never going to find anyone or if you do they will cheat on you well the next few paragraphs is for you.

You can all shut the hell up just saying because the people who are saving themselves for marriage, waiting whatever you want to call it doesn’t seem to judge the ones who don’t some may do and that’s them but I know I don’t. Especially when some people in my generation just stick their little hotdog in anything and let anything just be stuck in their holes but that’s none of my business. Like I was saying keep the opinion to yourself if it’s not positive or benefiting the person just shut up. Not everyone is obligated to be popping it open out here to every fine man they see that’s not everyone some women are different so who are you to judge someone for wanting to wait. It’s nothing wrong with waiting it may be unusual for the time period were in but that doesn’t make it something that shouldn’t still be accepted. Just like racism shouldn’t even still exist in this damn time period but were still fighting it today. So, let’s move on and realize that some people still save themselves for marriage and that’s totally okay. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Hello, I’m Jakaria aka Kari, Zodiac is a Cancer and I’m a Multimedia Journalism major located in Chicago, IL.

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