What Exactly Is ‘Sexy’?

Shutterstock / Zoom Team
Shutterstock / Zoom Team

What is exactly is “sexy”? Is it perky boobs, tiny waist, or perhaps a round, perky bubble butt? Or perhaps it is shapely legs? Sultry legs? Or maybe an item of clothing? Like garter belts and lace stockings? More importantly, is being sexy really just that?

I happen to believe being sexy is more than that, it is about knowing who you are and owning it. Whatever you’ve got, with a dash of confidence (not cocky or arrogant). You don’t have to fit into a pre made mold to be irresistible, and that pre-mold has always included big eyes, huge breasts and butts, slender waists and full, plump lips; but I understand most of us wanting to which stirs up another issue about belonging, which we just won’t talk about here.

And I do believe as of right now most women cannot simply “act” sexy, and will need to be taught on how to be sexy. Especially Chinese women and some of the American women, their sexuality has been suppressed so much therefore they’ve forgotten on how to be a temptress.

A woman should be able to be sexy if she wants to be without feeling like she is judged, or feeling like a “bad girl,” and the “slut-shaming” doesn’t help much either. Being sexy and pretty and irresistible will not be the woman’s mistake. “She’s too pretty.” Is that why you have to hit on her? Stop her on the road and use corny and trashy pick-up lines at her? Just wanting to get into her panties without caring for her as an intelligent human being? and women should not blame themselves for those trashy guys kept on hitting on her, or for people who is only after her for her body, she is pretty, darn right sexy, and hot, and dresses super sexy but it doesn’t mean you can just stop her in the middle of the road and ask her “if I can get to know you better” or “do you have a boyfriend,” it gets old and annoying fast gentlemen. Believe me, we can see right through you, you just wants the V. so instead of doing that plus with the asking for sex favors, can you at least talk to her? Strike up a decent conversation with her about…. Say, literature or art perhaps? Find common interests, or just treat her like a normal human being without throwing around empty compliments, stop with the “you are hot/sexy/cute/beautiful/gorgeous” crap, those are all empty! Let her know why exactly you think all those nice things about her, and list reasons. Treat her for coffee and read the signs, you’ll know she is interested, I promise.

Actually get to know her, her likes and dislikes, and you might actually be surprised.

Oh do not give me the line “Can I get to know you better?” crap when you’ve only heard my voice and it is clearly a wrong number.

Get to know her, build a damn friendship first, and not just a surface one, and be honest about your intentions, whether it is to be friends or actually date her, or just for sex, she might actually agree. But all that have to come after some sort of trust.

Now, with that being said, I clearly have trust issues, but yes, if you (yes you!) stops me on the street, I will not go out with you; I will not give you my phone number (especially when you just spoke to me two sentence later and asked me for my number); if you are on my Facebook friends list, I may or may not say yes to your requests; but I will not date you if I don’t know you very well, and I will not even consider to have sex with you if all you can offer is sex and if we only have surface friendship, and most certainly not when all you want from me is just sex. I am not your sex toy or any kind of toy, so don’t even bother.

Respect me, and be honest, that’s all I’m asking. I’m tired of feeling like a piece of meat because of what? I ooze sex appeal and I’m flirtatious? Bite me.

And that just concluded why I’m still single and NOT looking for anyone. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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