Just Because I’m Super Chill Don’t Mean You Gotta Throw Me Shade, Bro

I’m okay with feeling glimmers of self-consciousness every time someone brings up the super chill nature of my being. I faintly hear when I am asked what I plan to do tonight other than chill. Sometimes I think about lying. Sometimes I think about making up a lie involving dancing and illicit drugs.

But I’m kind of over thinking about lying. I’m kind of over feeling glimmers of shame for being super chill.

I am a supreme chiller but I never chose to be. I have Baby Boomer parents who are not super chill and I neutrally resisted their influence throughout my childhood. They wanted me to buck up and face the music. They demanded I get real and take a serious approach to my life.

I chill hard. I chilled through 9/11, high school and the Bush administration. I chill full time and I hardly notice when no one gives credit where credit is due. I am earnestly chilling at every moment and I look forward to a life where all is do is continue to chill.

I’d be okay if I stopped thinking about lying about the way I conduct my super chill life. I feel like I might want to stop thinking about saying this is just a phase. I am hardly able to say thank you when someone compliments me on my super chill nature. I have always felt that you should chill toward the life you want, not the life you have. I am taken chill-ly while I am alive and dress chill—and I have the resources to chill at all times.

I’m okay with thinking about justifying my based chillness and the backlash I receive when I tell people I was born chill and it’s not really that big of a deal. I’m fine with the looks I receive when I stroll chilled out to wherever.

So do whatever you want when you act like I’ve done something wrong. Go ahead and try to make me feel like I am less chill than I am. I didn’t ask to be born into this level of chillness but I’m cool with being recognized for it.

I’m not asking for sympathy, I’m asking to never ask another question again. It would be cool if people chilled out, though. There is always enough chill to go around and I’m not sorry that is my persepctive. I understand the value of a chill bro. I am not spending much time dwelling on it, though. I fail to understand the overwhelming lack of chillness of others and I softly discourage people to openly bitch about it. It’s fine. But your situation hampers my situation. I am irresponsible and fortunate for the chillness I possess. I’ll blankly disregard your background if you respect mine.