Studying abroad is a beautiful time in the life of a college student. It’s just like regular college, minus the studying part and plus a new population of people with fun accents. Below you’ll find a step-by-step guide on how to empty your bank account on expensive beer and reckless adventure.
1. Rationalize every purchase.
You needed those heels because they’re black so they’re “practical.” You’re only spending this much money because it’s the first week and you’re getting settled. You’re only spending this much money because it’s the fifth week and you’re still not settled. (This rule is by far the most important because in order to spend money you don’t have, you need to feel like buying a t-shirt for 35 euro was a good deal and that it has 3-quarter length sleeves, so you’ll wear it year-round. JUST MAKE UP ANY REASON AT ALL AND GO WITH IT.)
2. Never look at your checking account.
It will just make you sad and study abroad is about happiness and becoming a well-rounded person. Or something.
3. Don’t ever consider the exchange rate.
Pretend that it doesn’t matter at all, and your checking account is sure to look terrible in no time.
4. Make rash decisions.
Do not put thought or planning into anything. Sure, I’ll travel to Galway this weekend, just let me check my bank acc….wait I can’t, that would go against at least 3 of these rules!!
5. Do the most expensive things as possible.
Dinner for 20 euro? Sure! Travel to Italy for the weekend for 350? Even better!
6. When stores are cheap, what better reason to buy more of everything!
Just call it “saving!”
7. Really just avoid anything that’s free.
Festival in downtown? Skip it. Free comedy night? Take a nap instead. Wait, naps are free too, so find something really expensive.
8. Don’t spend your money wisely it at all.
It’s about priorities people. With large quantities of alcohol and industrial jars of Nutella being at the top of the list.
9. Spreadsheets and budgets are for business majors, accountants, and extreme couponers.
You are a humanities major that uses a calculator on your phone to do simple addition, so budgeting is just out of the question.
10. Most of all, have a good time, because if you’re going to go broke anyway, you might as well have fun doing it.
Right? Wait..right…? (*rationalizes a reason why that’s right*)