After college, I spent two years figuring out what it meant to be an adult while living and working on my own for the first time. Like any big change, this period of my life started with a large group of acquaintances picked up at orientations and trainings for my job. As time wore on, this large group whittled itself down to four girls who were like my appendages—I can no longer imagine my life without them. I’ve since moved on (and in with three male roommates), but these girls are ever present in my life and continually prove to me why I love being in a girl squad even though I never thought I would be.
1. They always tell you how it is.
You know you have entered a new level of friendship with someone when they stop telling you white lies for the sake of your ego and start telling you the truth. Most times, the things that you don’t want to hear about yourself are things you already know but are scared to face alone. That’s where the friendship aspect comes in. Not only will a girl squad help you figure out what’s up, but they’ll also stick through it with you and be there to tell you when it’s time to celebrate personal growth, a new relationship, a job promotion, or a newly minted ability to not fall for assholes.
2. Loneliness isn’t a thing—in fact, no kind of personal space at all is a thing.
People might begin to question your sexuality because nothing stops you from posting photos of you and your girls snuggling in bed together. There is always someone you know you can text or call at any hour of the day or night and receive a timely response. There’s some sort of unspoken agreement that anything and everything, from a favorite top to a fresh razor, can be borrowed without first asking permission. All of this closeness is borne from the knowledge that you would do the same for them.
3. They’re an extension of your family.
Don’t have a plus one to your sister’s wedding? Girl date. Don’t have anyone to travel with over spring break? Girl date. Need someone to trim your hair when you’re too broke to go to the salon? Girl date. Your parents start to wonder who you are hanging out with if you don’t mention the girls. You begin to trust these women with things that previously were reserved only for family—secrets, fears, hopes, and dreams.
4. Girls get shit done.
When you need someone to complete a PayPal only online purchase for you because you’ve been banned from using the service, you know exactly who will let you use their profile. There is a dependability within female friendships that you can’t find anywhere else. Love between two women, when it’s true, is only ever the shirt-off-your-back type of love.
5. You can have a completely fulfilling relationship.
When you’ve developed a relationship with another girl there is almost no role she can’t fill, but should there be something missing, another member of the squad will definitely fill in the gaps. There is the girl you go to for workout accountability, the one you gossip with boys about, the one who won’t let you back down in your career, and the one who can always make you feel like the Tina Fey to her Amy Poehler. These relationships eventually grow to exist outside of jealousy, cattiness, and competition. Hold on to these girls as long as you can; sometimes, soulmates aren’t of the romantic sort.