It’s true, you always want something that you can’t have. The unattainable automatically are so much more desirable than those things that aren’t. Team that up with brokenness, and BAM! I’ll probably be thinking about you a lot. There’s something about the people that have been hurt, there’s more to their “I’m fine.” There’s always a story, usually a long complicated one behind their smile that I always find as my number one motivation to uncover what eats at them. What makes them tick.
I want to talk to you. I’ll use words and whatever it takes to fix you. I’ll use my arms not only to hold you, but to also break down the walls you’ve created over the years to keep people from getting too close. I want you to strip for me — not just ’til I can see your perfectly defined abs but strip down so much that I can see your bare soul. I want you to hit not just on me, but hit the spots in my heart that feel good. Hit on the subjects that are on my mind, and make me comfortable enough to want to talk about them with you.
I would open up because I know you keep my secrets just as safe as you keep me. Your arms have always been enough for me to find safety. They’re my sanctuary, my getaway, and my safe place away from the real world. Lay the bed with roses; lose me as you put me down in them because you can’t tell the difference between the petals and my lips. Don’t kiss me; just watch me for a while. Tease me until you want just as much as I want you. Stop for a while and appreciate me. Appreciate the moment because every moment becomes a memory someday. Watch me shamelessly while I get ready for bed. I’ve tripped over wires, shoes, and even my own two feet. You laugh, not too hard but enough to make me feel cute. Stare at me every chance you get, learn about me. Get to know not just my thoughts, how my mind works but also each inch of my body. That birthmark, that scar, those tattoos, study them.
We’ll talk about the future, about your favorite things, and between those two things, don’t forget to mention my name in both. Bonus points for putting me on all your to do lists. I want to be on your speed dial so you can call me at 2 am and also 2 pm between your business meetings and work.
This is what I dream about on good nights. Someday I’ll see you and tell you all this in person. That night I see you, it won’t be in my dreams. It’ll be in a safe place under the stars and maybe it’ll rain like the old times. Maybe I won’t think twice about my hair or dress, I’ll just smile and so will you because we’ll know the old times are coming back. For good, this time around.