1. Planning nights out around whether he’ll be there.
I assure you he is not thinking about you when he makes the decision to go and knock back 10 beers and play pool with his friends. Chances are you’re going to drive your friends crazy trying to ‘bump into’ him and even then you’ll be so self-conscious about him being there you’ll have the worst night ever.
2. Checking his ‘last active’ online status.
He’s been active 20 minutes ago but not replied to your message from half an hour ago, he’s seen your story but not replied to your snapchat? Time for a breakdown. We all lead busy lives, chances are he’s out doing something where he either doesn’t have the time to properly respond or can’t, do not panic.
3. Making your private conversations not at all private.
Sometimes communication is not a guys strong point and often things do not get solved by screenshotting conversations and dissecting every word with your best girlfriends. Just imagine how you would feel if he was doing the same to you and the inevitable slagging he would get in the group chat for it.
4. Changing yourself for him.
He mentioned that band once and it somehow slipped out that you’ve been their biggest fan since they formed. Except you haven’t been, at all, and now you have to listen to their 123 song playlist on Spotify until your ears bleed and pretend to like heavy metal.
5. Making him responsible for the scenarios you are creating in your head.
You have been day-dreaming about the moment he finally wakes up and realises you are the girl of his dreams. You have already pictured the first Christmas with his family and how well you’re going to get on with his mother. Except he knows none of this and you have barely communicated that you like him, never mind that you’re expecting his proposal on the streets of Paris promptly.
6. Blaming him for problems in your past relationships.
So your last boyfriend cheated and now you have trust issues, that doesn’t mean every man is the same. Chances are you are not the only woman in his life and he has friends/work colleagues/family of the opposite sex, try not to turn into the ultimate green-eyed monster every time he dares to talk to a woman that isn’t you.
7. Put your life on hold.
You’ve seen a place you want to go to but you want to wait until you’re at the stage where it’s acceptable to ask him to go. Grab a friend or go by yourself, the most important thing you should be looking at before you get into a relationship is that you are still an individual who is achieving your own personal goals, you’ll be much happier in the long run.
8. Tone down your personality.
So you like really awful jokes and you have a laugh like a baby seal jumping on top of an air horn, embrace it! He’s going to find out eventually and what might seem embarrassing to you can be endearing to other people. If he doesn’t like you for you, is he really worth it?
9. Expect too much.
You may have a heart of gold and be willing to jump oceans for the people you care about but some people just aren’t programmed like that. Just remember that in every “did you get home safe?” and “I hope you had a good day” they are showing you that they care. Not everyone can have the same heart and a big gesture to one person can be completely different to a big gesture to someone else.
10. Let them decide your worth.
So it doesn’t work out, you see him and speak to him less and less and eventually you hear he’s been out for dinner three times with your best friend’s brother’s ex-girlfriend’s cousin. Take your time to cry a little bit, have a little Netflix binge and finish that tub of ice cream but never let it determine your self-worth. It didn’t work out this time but who’s to say the next guy won’t appreciate you for the goddess you are?