It doesn’t take much to become an instant Internet celebrity—you either do something heroic or you act like an ass, and POOF!—you’re famous. Nine times out of ten it involves acting like an ass, and the rare cases of heroism always involve heroic animals.
Ryutaro Nonomura is now a global superstar due to footage from yesterday of him wailing like a deprived infant at a press conference regarding his possible misappropriation of public funds.
In between teardrops and belly sobs and womanly gasps and gnashing of teeth, he managed to spit out these lines:
I finally became an assembly member … with the sole purpose of changing society … This Japan … I want to change this society … I have staked my life … Don’t you understand?
Oh, we understand better than you think: YOU’RE A BIG BABY. And we have evidence.