Healing from a toxic relationship takes time. It takes effort. You have to make the conscious decision to change, to better yourself, to put your past in the past.

In order to heal from a toxic relationship, you have to accept your ex is in your past. You have to delete their number from your phone. You have to avoid the urge to reach out to them when you are drunk, when you are lonely, when you are scared you’ve made a mistake by leaving them. You have to remind yourself they are out of your world for a reason. You have to remind yourself you are better off without them weighing you down.

In order to heal from a toxic relationship, you have to forgive yourself. Forgive yourself for accepting such poor treatment. Forgive yourself for staying for such a long time. Forgive yourself for growing distant from family and friends who were only trying to help you. Forgive yourself for ignoring the red flags, ignoring your gut.

In order to heal from a toxic relationship, you have to grow comfortable with the idea of being alone. You have to accept the single life is better than life with an abusive ex. You have to get used to being on your own. You cannot rebound with the first person who treats you better than your ex treated you. You cannot jump into a new relationship without working on ridding yourself of the baggage your last relationship brought you. You cannot assume a brand new relationship is the only thing that will make you feel better. You cannot let yourself believe happiness and relationship status are linked.

In order to heal from a toxic relationship, you have to raise your standards. You have to rediscover your self-worth. You have to practice self-care. You have to treat your mental health as a priority. You have to realize you are someone worthy of love and respect. You have to promise yourself you are not going to take crap from anyone anymore. You have to recognize what you deserve. You have to fight for what you deserve.

In order to heal from a toxic relationship, you have to remain patient. You have to remember results are not going to be seen overnight. It’s going to take a while to trust again. It’s going to take a while to love again. Your struggles are valid and so are your emotions. No matter how long your healing takes, you cannot give up on yourself. You cannot swear off of relationships. You cannot hide yourself away. You cannot assume you are unlovable and will never be happy again.

Even if it’s hard to believe right now, you are going to heal from this heartbreak. You are going to reach a place where you feel confident and strong again. You are going to mean it when you say you are okay. You just have to have faith in yourself. You are more resilient than you think.