No, I’m Not Adding You On Social Media

I don’t want anything to do with you.

I don’t want to see your face in pictures because your smile makes my stomach sick.

I don’t want any updates on your life. More importantly, I don’t want you knowing a thing about what is going on in mine. 

I don’t want you liking any of my photographs in a sad attempt to have contact with me.

I don’t want your name popping up when I celebrate a birthday, ruining my good mood.

I do not want you in my life in any capacity. I don’t want to think about you. I want to keep you as a distant memory.

I’m not adding you on social media because I do not want anything to do with you. Not even over a computer screen. Not even from hundreds of miles away.

Maybe sending a friend request seemed like an innocent thing for you to do on a lonely evening spent missing me, but I have no idea how you have the audacity to reach out to me.

What don’t you understand about leaving me alone?  

I stopped talking to you for a reason. I stopped being present in your life because I could not take your toxicity anymore. I could reach out to you if that was what I wanted — BUT IT IS NOT WHAT I WANT.

None of the texts you have sent me have been answered, so what makes you think I am going to respond any differently when you add me on social media? Reaching out to me on different platforms is not going to magically change my mind about you.

You can try and try to become a part of my world again but it is never going to happen.

Bothering me isn’t going to get you anywhere. You aren’t going to break down my walls. You are only going to annoy me. You are going to get yourself blocked.

The more you disrespect my wishes about parting ways, the more I will resent you. You have already given me enough reasons to hate you. Don’t give me more.

Maybe it seems like I am overreacting, maybe you think I should have gotten over what you put me through by now, but this kind of pain lingers.

Time does not heal all wounds. It will never close the ones you have ripped into me. 

I accept what has happened between us. But that doesn’t mean I forgive you.

Even if there comes a day when I reach forgiveness, that doesn’t mean you automatically earn a spot back in my world.

I can forgive you and still want nothing to do with you.

I can accept what happened in my past but strive to build a much better future.

That is what’s happening here. I am busy searching for success. I am working toward my dreams. I don’t have time for you and the darkness you trail along with you.

I am never going to add you on social media, so give me room to breathe. Stop trying to make up for what you’ve done. Leaving me alone is a better apology than guilt tripping me into talking to you again.