You Should Not Want To Be Chased

You Should Not Want To Be Chased

You should not want someone to chase after you because that implies a one-sided relationship. One person should not be doing all of the work. One person should not be putting in all the effort. You should be sharing that responsibility.

If your feelings for him are as strong as his feelings for you, then a chase will never happen. There will be times when he sends the first text and times when you send the first text. There will be times when he rearranges his schedule to see you and times when you rearrange your schedule to see him. Everything will balance out.

If he has to beg you to spend time with him, if he has to fight for your attention, then he must like you more than you like him.

If you returned his feelings, then you would be excited to spend a weekend with him. You would be excited to answer his texts. You wouldn’t keep him waiting. You wouldn’t play games with his heart.

When you like someone and they like you back, neither of you will be stuck staring at the phone, wondering why so many days have passed without hearing from each other. Neither of you will feel like you are getting led on or screwed over.

When you are on the same page, you take turns planning dates and sending good morning messages and dolling out compliments. You never feel like you are being neglected because you are not the only one doing all the work. And you never feel like you are stringing someone along because you are giving them as much as they give you.

The best relationships are between teammates. They are between two people who share the workload. Two people who give and take an equal amount. 

You should not want him to chase you because you have chased people before and you know how horrible it feels. It makes you insecure. It makes you stressed. It makes you exhausted. If you like someone, then you would never want them to go through that for you. You would never intentionally cause them pain.

Getting chased might temporarily give you a confidence boost. It might make you feel better about yourself for a short period of time. But in the end, someone is getting hurt.

Instead of wishing you would stumble across someone who liked you enough to chase you, you should be hoping for someone who gives you as many butterflies as you give him. Someone whose feelings match yours. Someone who is on the exact same page as you.

You should not want to be chased because the only way that is going to happen is for you not to care about the other person. That is the only time when you will be truly indifferent, which means that person is not the love of your life.

The only way a relationship is going to work is with balance. He cannot chase after you and you cannot chase after him. The two of you need to pursue each other. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

More From Thought Catalog