When Your Boyfriend Is Your Only Friend

When Your Boyfriend Is Your Only Friend
Unsplash / Jose Martinez

When your boyfriend is your only friend, you feel like the luckiest girl in the world because you found him. You discovered someone who laughs hard at your jokes and listens close to your stories and loves you with the same intensity you always return to him.

When your boyfriend is your only friend, you want to do everything together. You want to watch movies and explore towns and experiment with restaurants. You want to spend every waking second of the day alongside him — but obviously that cannot happen. Obviously that is unhealthy.

When your boyfriend is your only friend, you feel a surge of loneliness on weekends. It has nothing to do with him because he has been doing everything right. He has been your plus one to weddings and concerts and plays. He has gone drinking with you and watched crummy reality shows with you. He has gone above and beyond as a boyfriend.

But sometimes, you want friend time. You want to have someone to call up when he is busy. You want to have someone who is there for you outside of your relationship.

When your boyfriend is your only friend, you become overly possessive. You get annoyed when he wants to have guy time with his friends because you don’t have anyone to hang out with while he’s gone. You get frustrated when his work schedule doesn’t align with your plans because if he’s too busy to see a certain movie with you then you’re not going to see the movie at all.

When your boyfriend is your only friend, you feel like you are missing out. Even though you get to go on romantic dates and take vacations together, you feel like your social life is nonexistent. You feel like there is something wrong with you. You feel like, if you lost him, you wouldn’t have anyone.

When your boyfriend is your only friend, you wonder how other people find energy to maintain a social life. You wonder whether they got lucky and all of  their friends stayed in their hometown or whether they made new friends as they grew older.

You try your hardest to meet new people and to get close to them, but you struggle. You never know what to say. You never know what steps to take. You can’t believe how much harder it is to make friends as an adult because even when you were young you found it hard.

When your boyfriend is your only friend, you know your world needs adjusting. You know you cannot survive with him and him alone. You know you need to put yourself out there more and find people with the same interests as you so you are not always stuck home alone when he goes out with his friends or gets stuck at work late.

When your boyfriend is your only friend, you feel weird complaining because you are more than happy to have him — but you wish you had some other people too. TC mark

The truth is that you can be struggling and still be loved.

You don’t have to solve your whole life tonight. You just have to show up and try. Focus on the most immediate thing in front of you. You’ll figure out the rest along the way.

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