When You Love Someone, You Work On Yourself

When You Love Someone, You Work On Yourself

When you love someone, you do not get overly comfortable. You do not stop doing nice things for them because you already caught them. You constantly strive to make them happier than the day before. You continually grow.

When you love someone, you work on becoming a better person, because you want to make them as happy as humanly possible. You forget about your baggage as best as you can, because you don’t want to end up accidentally hurting them all because someone in your past left you with issues.

When you love someone, you work on your anger issues. You try your hardest to control yourself, to stop yourself from blowing up at your person after the slightest inconvenience or misunderstanding. You don’t want to scream at them for no reason. You don’t want to scare them. You don’t want them to feel like they cannot come to you with their fears and their secrets because you cannot have a mature, adult conversation.

When you love someone, you work on your communication issues. You vocalize your feelings more. You talk to them about what is bothering you instead of holding it all inside. You compliment them and say those three little words the second they pop into your head instead of avoiding intimacy. You allow yourself to be open with them. You don’t hold anything back and you certainly don’t lie.

When you love someone, you work on your trust issues. You allow your person to have space. You allow them to hang out with their friends. You allow them to have celebrity crushes. You allow them to live their life without begging to scroll through their phone, because you believe them when they say they are never going to hurt you. You know they are on your side. You know they are never going to be unfaithful.

When you love someone, you work on your abandonment issues. You don’t sabotage the relationship. You don’t worry about how they will eventually leave you the same way everyone else has in the past. You stop saying things like if we get married, if we stay together, if our relationship lasts and start talking with certainty. You allow yourself to feel confident with your commitment, even though it’s scary.

When you love someone, you try to become the kind of person they have always deserved. You try to make yourself feel worthy of their love.

When you love someone, you won’t feel the need to lose ten pounds to impress them or to change your entire wardrobe to seem sexier. The changes you will make for them will be on the inside. And you won’t  be making those changes because they asked you to change. They love you exactly the way you are. But you know deep down, in order to create the strongest relationship possible, there are certain things you need to work on. And you are willing to do it for them. You would do anything for them. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Holly is the author of Severe(d): A Creepy Poetry Collection.

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