When I Met My Forever Person, It Wasn’t Love At First Sight

Love At First Sight
Unsplash / Brooke Cagle

You are my person. You are the love of my life. You are my forever.

But it didn’t start off that way. When I first saw you, there weren’t any alarm bells going off in my head. There wasn’t a feeling in my gut that you were the one, that we belonged together, that you were going to change everything about my world.

I had no idea what you would grow to mean to me. You were just a person, a stranger, another someone. I cannot even remember what I thought about you when we first locked eyes, because I didn’t really have an opinion.

When we spoke for the first time, that changed slightly. I instantly felt comfortable with you, which is rare for me. Usually I am awkward and insecure around new people (and even people I have known for years). Normally I try to escape conversations as soon as possible and retreat into the corner to sit by myself.

But I liked being around you, even on that very first day. You were easy to talk to. You made me feel comfortable. I could see us being friends. I could see us getting along, getting closer.

But I still had no idea what would happen between us. I never could have guessed during those first few moments. I never had a hunch that our relationship was on the verge of being formed. I never knew what the universe had in store for us.

That is why I consider love at first sight to be bullshit. There have been a million times when I felt instant attraction to someone, when I felt drawn to only them even though there were dozens of other people in the room, and they turned out to be an asshole. There are so many times when I thought this is it, this could be the person I have been searching for, only to have my heart shattered by them.

Whenever I liked someone seconds upon seeing them, they disappointed me. But when I found you, the love of my life, I had no idea you would be the love of my life. I couldn’t see the future that clearly. It took first dates and clumsy kisses and late night conversations to learn what you meant to me.

Maybe other hearts are wired differently, but personally, I cannot love someone without knowing them intimately. I needed to hear childhood stories and dark thoughts and deep fears. I needed to see more than just the physical. I needed more in-depth information. I needed to fall for the soul and not just the body.

That is why love at first sight would never work for me. I don’t have some sort of sixth sense for romance and I would never judge off of looks alone.

The story of how I met my forever person is not a magical one. It doesn’t have rom-com potential. It was just an average day that turned into one of the most important days of my life. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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