I’m Not The Jealous Type (But I’m Not Stupid Either)

I'm Not The Jealous Type (But I'm Not Stupid Either)
Unsplash / Lauren Richmond

I only date people I trust, people who have my back, people who I genuinely believe have my best interest at heart, which is why I’m not the jealous type.

I’m not going to consider every other girl my competition. I’m not going to compare my beauty to everyone I meet. I’m not going to allow my insecurities to overshadow my common sense and ruin a perfectly healthy relationship.

When you date me, you are allowed to have female friends. You are allowed to have celebrity crushes. You are allowed to make your own decisions.

As long as you don’t give me any reason to become suspicious of you, I am going to trust you. I am going to give you the benefit of the doubt. I am not going to monitor every move you make on your phone. I am not going to freak out whenever you go drinking with friends. I am not going to control you and take away your freedom.

But I am not going to let you walk over me either. I am not going to let you spend one-on-one time with your ex when it’s clear she still wants you back. I am not going to let you send inappropriate snaps to girls you have never mentioned to me before. I am not going to let you come home from the club at three in the morning with the scent of perfume on you.

I am pretty laidback. I am pretty lenient. But if you try to take advantage of my trust and cheat on me, even microscopically, then my ‘chill’ mentality is going to disappear. You are not going to get away with betraying me. You are not going to think you have permission to do whatever the hell you want because I rarely check up on you.

You should respect how much I trust you. You shouldn’t use it as an excuse to screw around behind my back.

If I’m not snooping through your phone every time you leave the couch, that doesn’t mean you are allowed to download dating apps and flirt with other girls. It means I assume you are smart enough to avoid doing those things on your own. It means I don’t think I need to check in on you in order to make sure you are staying faithful. It means you should be doing the right thing without being watched over your shoulder.

If you prove you can be trusted, then we are never going to have a problem. But if you prove you cannot be trusted, then I am going to walk away. I am going to leave your life. I am going to stop wasting my time with you the second you become sketchy.

I am not a jealous person — but I am not a stupid person, either. If you hurt me, if you lie to me, if you treat me second best, then it’s over between us.

I am not going to keep someone around who cannot be trusted. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Holly is the author of Severe(d): A Creepy Poetry Collection.

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