I Want To Hang Out With You One-On-One

I Want To Hang Out With You One-On-One
Unsplash / Humphrey Muleba

Every time we see each other, we’re surrounded by other people. We usually get a chance to talk, because no matter how many others are crowding our space, we gravitate toward each other — we choose seats closest together, we let our skin brush, we let our hearts race in parallel — but I don’t like it when other people are nearby, stealing your attention. I want all of your focus directed at me.

I don’t want you to be pulled away in the middle of a conversation with me.  I don’t want the moment to be ruined because someone else happens to interrupt. I don’t want you to be distracted from flirting with me because you have other things on your mind. And I don’t want to feel like an audience is watching our love story unfold.

I feel like I have to show a certain amount of restraint when we’re in public. I don’t want to crawl all over you when outsider eyes are watching. That is why I censor my words. I am careful about what leaves my lips because even though I am comfortable with you, I’m uncomfortable with others seeing how comfortable we are together. I don’t need them to listen in on our conversations. I don’t need us to become a form of entertainment for them.

There are a million different reasons I don’t want other people in the room with us. I don’t want anyone to hear the flirtatious things I have been thinking about saying to you. I want to see what happens when we’re all alone, just the two of us, without anybody watching. I want to test our chemistry. I want to see how well we connect. I want to be unfiltered with you. I want to be raw and real.

I have been dying to spend one-on-one time with you, to sit inside your empty room and feel the hours tick passed like minutes. I want to have the time to ask you questions and swap opinions and learn more about the mind inside the body. I want the chance to delve into deeper conversations and take larger leaps.

I like hanging out with you in groups. It’s cute when you text me from across the room or share a glance with me that no one else is supposed to catch. I like when you look at me when you’re speaking even though there’s an entire roomful of other people. But I would like it even better if I had some alone time with you, if we were given the chance to explore our feelings without holding back.

I want to see what happens when we’re alone together. I want to see if one of us will be brave enough to take the next step, to make a move, to turn this unspeakable spark between us into a flesh and bone reality.

I want to hang out with you one-on-one. There’s no better way I can think of to spend my mornings, my nights, and all of the time in between. TC mark

The truth is that you can be struggling and still be loved.

You don’t have to solve your whole life tonight. You just have to show up and try. Focus on the most immediate thing in front of you. You’ll figure out the rest along the way.

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