You will lose a girl with a guarded heart by pressuring her into moving faster than she is comfortable. By making her feel guilty for not sleeping with you or calling you her boyfriend or saying those three little words as early as possible. By convincing her there is something deeply wrong with her for needing to develop a stronger connection before giving you everything she has to give.
You will lose a girl with a guarded heart by pressing too hard. By asking too many personal questions and becoming frustrated when she dodges without answering. You will lose her by expecting her to open up to you, just because you bought her a drink or took her out for dinner or gave her a compliment. She needs time. She needs to learn more about you before she is going to offer up information about herself. She will become an open book once she trusts you — but she does not trust others often.
You will lose a girl with a guarded heart by thinking too far ahead into the future. By talking about marriage and babies and moving in together when you have only been dating for a few months. She is the kind of girl who wants to live in the moment, who wants to see where this relationship takes her over time. She does not want to plan out a future with you she isn’t even sure she wants yet. She does not want to skip ahead.
You will lose a girl with a guarded heart by overwhelming her senses. By introducing her into your world in a single swoop instead of taking baby steps. She is not going to want to meet your parents on your first date. She is not going to want to say I love you right after your first kiss. She needs time to adjust to your relationship, time to grow used to this major change in her life. You need to stay patient with her. You need to encourage her to move as slowly as she needs.
You will lose a girl with a guarded heart by punishing her for her baggage. By getting angry when she needs room to breathe. By assuming she does not like you, even though she swears she does. She needs to feel safe with you and that is never going to happen if you keep freaking out over how long it is taking her to get comfortable in the relationship. You need to treat her heart gently.
You will lose a girl with a guarded heart by making it clear you wished she would act differently. By getting frustrated with her when her commitment issues reappear. By resenting her for being scared of something real. By encouraging her to change and making her feel like she is not good enough the way she is.
You will lose a girl with a guarded heart by giving up on her long before she is ready to open that heart up to you.