Why Falling In Love Sucks When You Are Still Heartbroken From The Last Time

falling in love
Unsplash / Beth Solano

Love never walks into your life when you are ready. It always appears at the worst possible time, like when you are still healing from the last relationship that left you broken inside.

You don’t want to lose a good guy. You don’t want to turn him down because you are still daydreaming about your ex. You don’t want to miss out on the opportunity to create something great because you are living in the past.

But you don’t want to hurt this guy either. You don’t want to jump into a new relationship before you are fully ready and end up dragging your baggage behind you. You don’t want to blame this new person for your ex’s mistakes. You don’t want to take your frustration out on him because he doesn’t deserve your wrath. He deserves your love and affection — but you’re unsure if you are able to give it to him. At least, not right now. Not while you are still healing.

It’s tough to decide whether you are going to let yourself take a chance on love again so soon, even though your wounds are still healing. Even though you know you are going to compare this guy to the last guy, as unfair as that sounds.

A part of you is worried that if you let this new person go, this good person, this person who you could imagine creating a long-lasting relationship with, you might regret it. You might never find someone who fits you this well.

Besides, your ex has moved on already, so you should be able to do the same. You should be able to live your life without him.

The timing sucks and you don’t want to let that get in the way of your blossoming love story. But at the same time, you know you aren’t ready to give someone else everything he deserves. You know you are going to keep your heart guarded. You are going to have trouble trusting him. You are going to have trouble committing to him when half of your heart is elsewhere.

It sucks when you find someone who is perfect for you at a bad time. You feel like, no matter what decision you end up making, it will be the wrong one. You feel like you are stuck in between a rock and a hard place.

You can either decide to take a chance on this new person and hope you are able to be present when he needs you. Hope you are able to give him what he deserves. Hope you are in the right mindset to keep the relationship strong and healthy and balanced.

Or you can decide to take some more time to yourself. Time to heal from your heartbreak. Time to find closure. Time to rediscover who you are and what you want from this world. Time to decide whether you are going to be ready for another relationship anytime soon or whether the single life is what you need for a while longer. TC mark

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