When he gets caught cheating, he is going to promise you it meant nothing. It was only sexual. It was only one time. It only happened when he was drunk. He is going to make the biggest betrayal possible sound like it was an accident, no big deal, something you should not hold over his head forever.
When he gets caught cheating, he is gong to swear that he will change. He is going to convince you that he deserves another chance because cheating on you made him realize how much he loves you and how much he would hate himself for losing you. He will beg you to give him one more chance and promise he will not screw it up because you mean everything to him.
When he gets caught cheating, he will go overboard when it comes to ‘doing the right thing’. He will make a show of deleting every single woman on his phone in front of you. He will take a break from social media. He will give you the passwords to his phone and email. He will take great lengths to make you feel like you have nothing to worry about.
When he gets caught cheating, he will go out of his way to make you feel like you’re his only one. He will be more affectionate. He will hold your hand in public. He will go down on you in the bedroom. He will give you bucketloads of attention to make up for his neglect in the past and to lessen his guilt.
When he gets caught cheating, he will return to acting like the perfect boyfriend. It will remind you of the way he used to act back when you first started dating. He will buy you flowers. He will plan out dates. He will call you beautiful every chance he sees. He will make you feel special. He will lure you into a false sense of security.
After you catch him cheating, there will be a timeframe where you feel like you did the right thing by staying. Weirdly, you will feel like your relationship is doing better than ever before.
But after some time passes, it will get worse again. He will come home late, you will question where he was because you’re worried he was with another girl, and he will make a comment about how it’s been so long since he cheated and he thought he earned your trust back by now.
He will get annoyed by the questions you have a right to ask. He will get angry when you seem suspicious of him, even though it’s his own fault.
When you catch him cheating, your entire dynamic will change. When he so much as mentions another woman’s name, you will wonder whether he’s thought about sleeping with her. Meanwhile, you’ll feel like you have the right to flirt with other men because he touched another woman so what you are doing is tame in comparison.
When you catch him cheating, your deepest insecurities will rise to the surface. A part of you will want to dye your hair and lose wait to impress him because if he cheated, he must have stopped being attracted to you. Another part of you will want to cheat on him to make him feel the way that you now feel every single day when you glance into the mirror.
When you catch him cheating, you will run through the past in your head, trying to figure out when he was talking to her, when he was seeing her, when he was kissing her. You will see how many lies you can count off the top of your head. Happy memories will become tainted with what ifs.
What if he saw her the night he claimed he was sick with the flu? What if he was thinking about her the last time you had sex? What if he’s still seeing her now even though he swore he would never contact her again?
When you catch him cheating, your mind will never leave you alone. It will torture you from the moment you wake up until the moment your head hits the pillow at night.
Worst of all, after you catch him cheating and forgive him, he might feel like he’s free to cheat again. He might assume you will forgive him the next time too. He might even be sneakier next time. He might learn from his mistakes. He might know what he did wrong in the past and fix it.
Even if he keeps his promise and remains faithful for the rest of your relationship, after you catch him cheating the first time, your entire opinion of him will change. You won’t think of him as the person who would never hurt you, because you already know he’s capable of hurting you. You won’t think of him as the love of your life, because if he really loved you, could he have betrayed you like this?
After you catch him cheating, do yourself a favor and leave him, because the relationship is never going to be the same. You are never going to feel as safe and loved as you used to when he walked into the room.