Stop Fighting For Him

Jenny Woods

Stop fighting for him. You are stressing yourself out. You are the one who has been putting in all of the work lately because your love for him is so strong. Because you feel like he is worth the energy.

You haven’t been looking at the situation logically. You have been going with your gut instincts instead of sitting down and taking the time to think through whether or not this relationship is really worth your effort.

Ask yourself whether you want someone who you have to fight tooth and nail for, someone who is hardly willing to lift a finger for you, someone who allows your relationship to tilt to one side.

You cannot salvage the relationship on your own. Both people need to contribute to the success of the relationship. If he is unwilling to compromise with you, to put effort into you, to be vulnerable with you, then you have to admit defeat. You have to accept the love has run its course.

Leaving behind a bad relationship does not make you a quitter. You are allowed to walk away. You are allowed to say you both deserve better.

Giving up on someone you love does not make you weak. It takes so much more strength to say goodbye than it does to stay.

Stop lying to yourself about how there is still a chance your relationship could work when you have already spotted a dozen red flags. Stop claiming your person might change his tune soon, even though you have gone through the same problems more than once and nothing has gotten better. Stop holding onto this perfect version of your person in your head and look at the reality. Look at what has really been happening.

Don’t be stubborn. Don’t keep fighting to prolong the inevitable. Don’t bring more pain onto yourself.

You shouldn’t feel guilty about the ending of your relationship. Up until this point, you have done everything you can. There is nothing more you can do without burning yourself out. It’s time to leave. Your love story with him has ended, but there is another one waiting right around the corner.

Remember: There are better ways to spend your time than fighting for a relationship that is past saving.

You might still love him, but that doesn’t mean you are meant to stay together. You might have been happy with him once upon a time, but then is not now.

You should be with someone who is excited about putting equal effort into your relationship. Someone who will make sure you are not the only one trying.

Relationships are difficult. Love takes hard work. But you should never have to fight for your person to stay. You should never have to convince them you’re worthy of their respect. You should never have to give them reasons to stick around.

They should already know you’re worth it. They should decide to stay on their own.

If you are the only one fighting for your relationship, then it’s a battle you are going to lose. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Related

More From Thought Catalog