He’s Not Your Forever Person Unless He Eats You Out… A Lot

A girl ready for someone to go down on her
Instagram / Jesse Herzog

He’s not your forever person unless he makes an effort text back, to get along with your parents, to make you smile — and to make you orgasm.

Putting effort into everyday life isn’t enough. He should also be putting effort into the bedroom.

If you are willing to spend hours waxing, days wearing uncomfortable thongs, and nights rocking too-tiny lingerie — then he should be willing to set the mood with music and light candles and engage in foreplay for longer than five measly minutes.

His expectations about sex should never be higher than yours are. You should be on the same page. You should be getting back as much as you are giving in the first place.

If you are willing to put in the effort to turn him on, then he should be willing to do the same for you.

If you are willing to get on your knees for him, then he should be willing to do the same for you.

If you are willing to make him orgasm, then he should be willing to do the same for you.

You two consider each other equals outside of the bedroom, and it should be the same inside of the bedroom.

He’s not your forever person if he acts like you are being unreasonable by expecting the same exact thing he expects from you. If he is perfectly fine with your sex life being off balance, because he has the better deal.

He’s not your forever person if he keeps making excuses about how he hates going down on girls, even though he expects you to go down on him every time your period arrives. He’s not your forever person if he whines about how long it takes you to finish when it sometimes takes him just as long. He’s not your forever person if he feels like he deserves more attention in the bedroom, just because he has a penis.

If he’s your forever person, he is going to pay attention to the way your body works. He is going to test what makes you moan the loudest. See what gives you the strongest orgasms.

Your forever person won’t consider going down on you a chore. He is going to do whatever it takes to get you off.

If he’s your forever person, he’s going to make sure sex is as good for you as it is for him. He will care about your happiness as much as his own. He won’t want to have sex unless you’re both enjoying it, because he’s not a selfish asshole. He knows you two are a team. 

That is why he’s not your forever person unless he eats you out. Unless he makes you orgasm as often as possible. Unless he gives as much as he is receiving.

Because if he couldn’t care less about your happiness/comfort/pleasure inside of the bedroom, it might be a reflection of how he feels about you outside of the bedroom. It might mean your relationship isn’t as strong as you think. TC mark

This is me letting you go

If there’s one thing we all need to stop doing, it’s waiting around for someone else to show up and change our lives. Just be the person you’ve been waiting for.

At the end of the day, you have two choices in love – one is to accept someone just as they are and the other is to walk away.

We owe it to ourselves to live the greatest life that we’re capable of living, even if that means that we have to be alone for a very long time.

“Everyone could use a book like this at some point in their life.” – Heather

Let go now

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