When you don’t trust your own judgement, you start second guessing yourself early in relationships. You wonder whether the person you chose is really worth your time when he treats you like a second choice. You wonder whether he should be considered toxic for not reaching your expectations. The entire time you are dating him, you are worried history is going to repeat itself. You are convinced your person is going to screw you over somehow because you always fall for the wrong kind of guy. The kind of guy who will stomp onto your heart without glancing down to check the damage.
However, if you trust that you have picked someone worthy of your time and attention, then you aren’t going to let yourself become paranoid. You won’t waste your energy wondering whether your person is going to get bored of you and betray you. You won’t spend hours skimming through his texts when he leaves the room, searching for breadcrumbs of infidelity. You won’t drive yourself nuts by considering the possibility he will abandon you out of the blue. You won’t let those crazy scenarios play inside your head, because you will feel confident that he isn’t going anywhere.
You will trust that he will stick by your side, no matter what, because you trust that you made the right decision in choosing him. Not a blinded decision based on what your heart said. Your head was involved, too. You made sure you didn’t jump headfirst into a random relationship because you were lonely or tempted by his attractiveness. You considered the pros and cons. The risks and rewards. You made a decision based on what you thought would bring you the most happiness. You thought everything through before committing. You made sure you were making the right choice.
If you trust yourself, then there is nothing to worry about, because you would never settle for someone who mistreats you. Someone who takes advantage of your soft heart. Someone who makes you feel like you aren’t enough. You have high standards. You would never enter a relationship with someone beneath you. You have too much dignity for that. You love yourself too much for that.
If you have a habit of falling for unobtainable, unrealiable men, then you should stay single until you redefine your tastes. Until you decide you deserve more and work toward fulfilling that standard. Don’t keep falling into the same trap and dating identical guys with different faces. Take a break from dating until you can honestly say that you believe in your own decision making, because the first step to trusting someone else is trusting yourself.
That way, even if the relationship unexpectedly falls apart, you will trust yourself to move on from the heartbreak. You will trust yourself to find happiness again, without him. You will trust yourself to keep the past in the past while you inch toward your future.
At the end of the day, you should trust your own judgement. Trust your gut instincts. Trust that you are smart enough to pick the right person.