You have a vibrator. You have access to an internet filled with porn. And you have your own two hands. You aren’t sexually frustrated, because you keep yourself satisfied. Whenever you touch yourself, you are guarenteed an orgasm. With someone else, you never know.
These days, you haven’t had the time to think about sex. You have been too busy. Dating is the last thing on your mind. When you were younger, being single for this long would have bothered you. But now? You have more important things to worry about than how empty your bed has become.
You have slept with toxic people before. People who used you for sex. People who never treated you the way you truly deserved. You are on a mission to never make that mistake again. Instead of thinking about dating, you are trying to focus on yourself. That is why you aren’t embarrassed about how long it’s been since you’ve had sex. You are proud of yourself for resisting the temptation to chase after the wrong people.
If you’re being completely honest, sex isn’t a big deal to you. That is why you aren’t sexually frustrated, but you are romantically frustrated. You wish someone would come along and sweep you off your feet. You wish you could start your happily ever after because you are sick of waiting.
You aren’t opposed to one-night stands and friends with benefits. That is why, lately, you have decided to swipe through Tinder and look for someone to drink with on weekends. Even if you don’t hit it off and see them ever again, at least you’ll get to have one night of fun. To you, that is better than nothing. So you are never sexually frustrated for long, because whenever you want sex, you have sex.
You act like you aren’t sexually frustrated, but whenever your friend goes on a date, you beg them for details. You want to know every little thing about what happened — even in the bedroom. You are trying to live vicariously through them.
Lately, you have turned into a huge flirt. You wouldn’t actually sleep with half of the people who you have been teasing, but it’s fun to fantasize about. And when they flirt back, you love the ego boost it gives you. It makes you feel sexy.
The problem is that you want sex, but you don’t want to have casual sex. You want to sleep with someone who means something to you. You consider yourself sapiosexual, because unless you can have an intellectual conversation with someone, you cannot imagine sharing a bed with them. You aren’t interested in idiots.
Whenever someone touches you, even if it’s as small as a touch on the shoulder, you become turned on. You have been falling for people quickly lately, because you are starved for affection. Sex would be amazing, but so would a massage. So would a hug. So would hand holding.
You realize a relationship isn’t necessary for happiness. You are already happy. With your career. With your friends. With yourself. But when someone attractive walks into your field of vision, the first thing you do is picture them naked. You can’t remember the last time you were kissed and it’s killing you. Your heart doesn’t need someone, but your body is dying for anyone.
At this point, you aren’t even looking for a relationship. You are only looking for someone to sleep with and never see again. You want to get laid and if you have to lead someone on for that to happen, you will.
You have gone through such a long dry spell that you have actually started lowering your standards. You have been texting back and forth with people you normally wouldn’t be interested in at all. You might have even gone as far as to text (or sext) your ex. It’s gotten that bad.