She doesn’t want to hear a sob story about how your last relationship screwed with your head. She doesn’t want to hear about how your ex-girlfriend cheated on you three years ago and you still aren’t over it. She doesn’t want to hear excuses about how you really like her and could imagine dating her in the future but the timing isn’t right.
If you aren’t ready for a relationship, that’s fine. Everyone moves at their own pace. Everyone heals in different ways. If you aren’t ready for a relationship, you aren’t ready for a relationship. If you don’t want to date her, you don’t want to date her. She understands all that.
But don’t you dare waste her time if you aren’t going to commit to her. Don’t lead her on with empty promises about how you’ll see her this weekend. Don’t spam her social media with likes and tell her that you miss her after one weekend apart and make her feel like it’s only a matter of time until you change your mind and become her boyfriend if you already know that is never going to happen. Don’t give her false hope. Don’t lead her on.
She doesn’t want to spend half of her day texting back and forth with you if you aren’t interested in seeing her face-to-face at some point. And she doesn’t want to cuddle in bed with you and take her clothes off for you if that’s the most she’s ever going to get from you.
If you want something casual, that’s fine. She’s not judging you. But she’s not the girl for you, either.
She has reached a point in her life where she wants a serious relationship. Not an almost relationship. Not a friend who acts like more than that. And certainly not a fuck buddy or a booty call.
She wants someone who wants her. Someone who holds her hand in front of friends and shows her off to family. Someone who is excited to take her out on a real date instead of hiding her away in the bedroom.
She doesn’t want to chase you down. She doesn’t want to work hard to impress you. She doesn’t want to wait months for you to realize that she is the girl for you.
She wants someone who realizes she’s special from the start. Someone who is interested in dating her right after meeting her because the connection is clear right away.
She doesn’t want to date someone who hesitates to commit to her. Someone who isn’t sure if she’s worth leaving the single life behind for. Someone who is keeping their options open because they think someone better might come along soon.
She doesn’t want to be the person you end up choosing after a few months because you’re stuck with her and might as well make her your girlfriend. She wants to be your only option. The girl you can’t wait to call your own. The girl you are happy to commit to for the rest of your life.