I Stopped Believing In Fairy Tales Because Of You

A girl who stopped believing in fairy tales
Unsplash / Esther Tuttle

You are the reason why I mistake late night texts and kisses inside of bathroom stalls for romance. You are the reason why I have let my standards drop so low without even realizing they have fallen. You are the reason why I accept half of someone’s heart and assume that I already have the whole thing.

You are the reason why I have such a screwed up view on love. You are the reason why I grow attached to anyone who gives me the slightest bit of attention and assume that it means something special. You are the reason why I think it’s normal for girls to be treated like shit by their person. You are the reason why my expectations are so low. You are the reason why I keep giving more to others than they give back to me.

You are the reason why I have trouble trusting people. You are the reason why I struggle to believe that anyone is going to remain faithful to me. You are the reason why I think that the universe is never going to let me stay happy for too long. You are the reason why I tell myself that every good thing is bound to end eventually.

You are the reason why I am always waiting to get hurt again. You are the reason why I think that romance always ends in heartache. You are the reason why I have no idea what a healthy relationship looks like.

You are the reason why I assume that everyone has secret motivations for talking to me. You are the reason why I have trouble believing that anybody would ever want to stay with me when they could easily walk away.

You are the reason why I spend lonely weekends wondering whether I am better off alone. You are the reason why I have decided to guard my heart instead of wearing it on the edge of my sleeve. You are the reason why I push people away, even when they have proven to me that they are nothing like you.

You are the reason why I have never been in a real relationship. You are the reason why talk about the future and serious commitment scares me. You are the reason why I keep hesitating to form lasting bonds.

You are the reason why I no longer believe in fairy tales. In forever. In love that lasts a lifetime.

But that is okay. Because you are also the reason I have become so independent. You are the reason why I take my time getting to know someone’s true intentions instead of jumping straight into a relationship with them. You are the reason why I keep both of my eyes open wide enough to spot red flags. You are the reason why I am never going to rely on a relationship to bring me happiness. You are the reason why I think with my head instead of my heart. You are the reason why I am making it just fine on my own. TC mark

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