This Is What Moving On Means Because It Is More Than Looking Happy On Instagram

Girl who is moving on
Unsplash / Kinga Cichewicz

Moving on is more than changing your relationship status on Facebook. It’s more than taking down your couple photos on Instagram and replacing them with photos of you living your best life. It’s more than manipulating the world into thinking that you’re perfectly fine on your own, that the breakup didn’t impact you at all.

Moving on means being able to look through old photographs without breaking into tears, because you’re past the pain. You’re past the point of wishing things had turned out differently. You’ve reached a place where you can look back on your memories with a smile, where you can be happy that you met each other, but also happy that you left each other.

Moving on means that you no longer refer to your ex as crazy and make them out to be the bad guy when telling stories. You don’t have any hard feelings, so you don’t bash them whenever you have the chance. And if you ran into them somewhere, you would treat them like an old friend. You see no reason to treat them like crap.

Moving on means that you can listen to their favorite song or watch their favorite show without thinking about how it was their favorite song or show. It means that you can finally enjoy all of the things that stung right after the breakup again.

Moving on means that you struggle to remember the exact shade of their eyes and the sound of their voice. And no matter how much you rack your brain, you can’t recall the name of their dog or their mother or their sister anymore. The little details are slowly leaving your mind.

Moving on means that you no longer read their horoscope. You no longer remember their birthday or the date of your anniversary. You no longer look for them everywhere that you go, secretly hoping that you’ll see them and dreading that you’ll see them at the same time.

Moving on means that you notice other attractive people, and don’t compare them to your ex. It means that you flirt with those other attractive people — not to make your ex jealous or to make you feel better about yourself — but because you actually want to do so.

Moving on means that you have stopped missing them. Your fingers have stopped itching to text them. You would rather hang out with your friends, with that new person you’re crushing on, or with your own self than see if they can meet up.

Moving on means that your heart doesn’t sink when you see a photograph of them with someone new. Your day isn’t ruined when you find out that they are moving out of state. Your mood doesn’t depend on something that they do or do not decide to do.

Moving on means that you can find out that they’re getting married or expecting a child and are honestly able to say that you are happy for them instead of jealous. You are happy they aren’t still hung up on you after all this time. You are happy they decided to settle down. You are happy they have found someone who fits them better than you ever could.

Moving on means that you have deleted all of their messages from your phone. You have stopped stalking their social media. You have lost the desire to talk about them. You have given up on the chance that you’ll reunite one day. You have accepted that you’re happier without them than you ever were together. TC mark

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The truth is that you can be struggling and still be loved.

You don’t have to solve your whole life tonight. You just have to show up and try. Focus on the most immediate thing in front of you. You’ll figure out the rest along the way.

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