Honestly, Loving Him Is A Waste Of Your Time

Instagram / Thought Catalog

You waste time waiting for texts that are never going to come. Waiting for dates that are never going to be planned. Waiting for a commitment that he is never going to make.

You waste time examining mixed signals. You waste time overthinking the texts he sends. You waste time trying to figure out what the hell he’s thinking because he is never straight with you.

You waste time asking your friends for advice on how to get him to stay interested in you. You waste time complaining to your mom about how he doesn’t take your relationship seriously. You waste time debating whether or not you should stay with him.

Most of all, you waste time hoping that he’ll change. Hoping that he’ll see that he’s wrong and you’re right. Hoping that he’ll wake up one day and be the man you always knew he could be.

It’s normal to daydream about what things would be like if he actually cared — but you have to remember those are only dreams. The reality of the situation is he treats you like shit.

He isn’t going to wake up one day and decide that he should treat you better. He isn’t going to change his ways.

If you keep letting him get away with ignoring your messages and canceling plans, then he’ll keep doing it. He won’t care that he’s hurting you. All he’ll care about is the fact that you’ve given him the freedom to do whatever the hell he wants and have shown him you will still stick around through it all.

Loving him is a waste of your time. Hoping that he will have a change of heart is a waste of your time. Putting in effort while he sits on his ass and does nothing is a waste of your time.

You’re better off being single than sitting in bed, wishing that this guy would treat you better tomorrow than he’s treated you for a thousand yesterdays.

You’re better off searching for someone new who will treat you with respect from the start than nagging this guy to change when he clearly has no interest in doing so.

Trying to fix a situation this broken is a waste of your time. Tricking yourself into believing that maybe if you did something differently, then he would like you better, is a waste of your time.

Making him promise he’ll change his ways when you know that promise will get broken is a waste of your time. Trying to talk sense into him when you know he doesn’t care about your feeling is a waste of your time. Training him to be a good boyfriend instead of acting like a fuckboy is a waste of your time.

You need to find someone who knows how to treat you with respect from the start. Someone who never shows up late or leaves texts unread. Someone who doesn’t have to make up for hurting you, because he never hurt you in the first place.

Someone who makes you feel loved at every moment of every day — and never makes you feel like you’re wasting your time. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Holly Riordan is the author of Lifeless Souls, available here.

Related

More From Thought Catalog