Sex doesn’t seem like that big of a deal when you’re single and doing it casually or when you’re dating the wrong person. It’s just a way to relax. To unwind. To have some fun.
But when you find the right person, sex stops feeling like some carnal activity. It starts to hold more significance. It becomes something intimate, fragile.
When you’re with someone you love, you don’t stare at the wall or the headboard. You don’t keep quiet out of fear of sounding silly. You don’t leave the second that sex is over.
You look each other in the eyes. You communicate. You cuddle. You make sure that their experience is as fulfilling as yours.
You care about their happiness as much as your own — maybe even more than your own. Your not kissing them to give yourself pleasure. You’re doing it for the both of you. Because you are a team, you are one.
When you’re with the right person, you aren’t having sex in order to fulfill a primal need. You’re having sex, because you can’t imagine wasting another second apart from your partner. You don’t want to wait any longer to press your lips and thighs and hips together.
When you have sex with them, you’re trusting them to treat you the way you deserve. You’re trusting them not to push you into anything you’re uncomfortable with. You’re trusting them with something precious, your body. And maybe even your heart.
When your heart is involved, every touch feels different. More intense.
Because when you have sex with someone you love, you’re not busy thinking about how you’re going to sneak out of their bedroom and ignore their texts the next day. You’re thinking about how much you care about them. About how your bodies feel like they belong together.
When you’re with the right person, sex won’t be the same twice. Some days, it’ll be rough. Animalistic. And other days you’ll take things slow. You’ll touch each other gently and whisper about your love as you rock back and forth.
And since you trust that person, you’ll feel comfortable spilling your fantasies to them. You’ll let them know about the kinks you used to keep secret, about all of the things you were too embarrassed to admit to casual partners.
Of course, there’s nothing wrong with casual sex. Sex can mean absolutely nothing and still feel amazing.
But sex can also be meaningful. It can be emotionally intimate and orgasmic all at once.
It all depends on the person that you’re with.