He asks you about your family. He writes you romantic letters. He makes you feel beautiful for the first time in your life. He’s the perfect on-paper boyfriend and you desperately want him to be the one, but it doesn’t mean that he is the one.
Not every guy with manners is meant to become your boyfriend.
The problem is that you’re so used to being treated like shit. You’re so used to unanswered texts and unreasonable requests that you mistake his kindness for love.
Yes, he’s a good guy for picking you up on dates and for calling to hear your voice and for buying your mother flowers. But it doesn’t mean he’s the guy. It doesn’t mean he’s meant to be your husband.
There’s a difference between liking someone’s inner soul and liking the way someone makes you feel. He’s a perfect gentleman, so you feel respected. You feel important. You feel like you actually matter.
But that’s how you should feel all the time. That’s how every guy should treat you.
You can’t date him, just because he’s nice. There should be love layered beneath your compliments and late night conversations. If there isn’t, then he’s not the right one for you. Even though he does everything for you. Even though you feel like a horrible person for turning him away.
Despite what your head is telling you, there isn’t something wrong with you for being incapable of loving the guy that would love you right. So you shouldn’t feel bad if there isn’t any fire. Chemistry isn’t something you can spark with a match — it occurs naturally or not at all.
He may treat you right, but that doesn’t mean he’s your forever person.
Don’t date him, just because he’s the first guy to cuddle without trying to unzip your jeans. Don’t date him, just because he treats you the way you were destined to be treated. Love requires respect — but it’s not only about respect. There should be lust and trust and affection and attraction. You should have it all.
You can’t feel bad about abandoning the boy that treats you right, because he deserves more than the love you’ve been toiling to give him. Letting him go will give him the chance to find the right girl, a girl that loves him for everything he is, and not just for everything he can give her.
And one day, you’ll find another nice guy. Another guy that pulls out your chair and kisses your forehead and nicknames you beautiful. But this time, it will feel different. You won’t like him, because he’s nice and you feel obligated to fall for him. You’ll like him for him. Not just for the way he makes you feel — but for the person that he is, and for the person he makes you want to be.