Even if you find a man that deserves all your love, he won’t make a difference. He won’t be your light switch, causing you to go from hating your life — hating yourself — to loving everything about it. It doesn’t matter how many times he holds you close or how warm his body feels against yours.
Sure, he’ll make you feel good in the moments that he’s there, arms slung around you, but he can’t always be there. He can’t hover over your shoulder to shoo the sorrow away. He needs to commute to work. He needs to bond with his friends. He needs to live his own life.
Even when you have a boy’s love, there will be endless moments when you’re alone — alone with your thoughts, alone with your own darkness.
He can’t be your hero. He can’t rescue you. Because he’s an outsider. And you can only be healed from within. You can only save yourself.
So find something that you’re passionate about, whether it’s writing or painting or dancing or accounting. Find something that makes you feel like you’re contributing to society. Like you’re creating a substance that wouldn’t have existed without you. Like you’re helping the world — or even just helping yourself.
Find something that gives you reason to jump out of bed at 7 AM, even when your boyfriend is too busy to see you all weekend. Something that gives you enough motivation to keep on living, even when you had a major fight with him and feel like dying.
Your entire life can’t revolve around one other person, no matter how perfect that person may be.
You need something else. Something bigger than one heart, one soul. Something bigger than a single human.
So stop dwelling on your disappointment when he fails to comment on your newest Instagram photo. Stop wasting your time, waiting for his next text.
Instead of staring at your cell phone, jumping whenever you get a notification, do something worthwhile with your time. Find your passion and follow it. Whenever you have a spare moment, follow it.
Think of all the power you have. Not just the power to break a heart or to fall in love — but the power to create. The power to change the world, albeit a step at a time. All of that power is hidden within you. And when you find your passion, you can start to release it. You can start to make a difference.
Because you shouldn’t waste your me time counting down the seconds until you see him again. You shouldn’t mope around whenever you’re left alone with your own thoughts. You shouldn’t be terrified of your own psyche.
To become comfortable alone, you need to find something rewarding to do when everyone else scatters. Something that makes you look forward to having some time to yourself. Something that you’re deeply, unabashedly passionate about.
Because, when you find that passion, you’ll also find a fresh side of yourself. A side that you can be proud of, whether you’re single or taken, whether you’re lonely or a loner.
It’s officially time to stop looking for a man to save you, because only your passion can save you. Only you can save you.