1. Go lingerie shopping online. Or, if you already own some sexy pieces, slip into them and take pictures. You don’t have to send them to anyone. You can save them for a man in the future. Or for your own personal collection.
2. If no amount of make-up and hair products can make you feel pretty, because you’re having such an off day, then upload a throwback picture to Instagram. One where you looked super sexy. The likes you get are a shallow way to improve your mood, but hey, whatever works.
3. Read erotica. The beauty of 2017 is that you can read dirty, disgusting smut on your Kindle or iPhone without anyone realizing it.
4. Get rid of all of your old underwear, the type that’s filled with holes, the type that you only wear during your period. Try branching out and buying something lacy, something that matches your bra, so that you can walk around feeling fierce.
5. Exercise. Or at least slip into your sports bra and yoga pants, and pretend that you’re about to exercise, so you can feel better about yourself.
6. If you live alone, walk around the house naked. Or at least while wearing a bathrobe. It will help you become more comfortable with your body.
7. Masturbate. Remember that hot kiss between Mickey and Ian on Shameless? Fantasize about that. Even better, imagine you were there with them.
8. Put on the type of music that you like to listen to during sex. It’s hard to mope around when you have a hot guy crooning into your ear.
9. Pamper yourself by getting a facial or having your nails done at a salon. When you’re typing on your keyboard and see unchipped nails for the first time in forever, you’ll feel like you finally have your life together.
10. Sext someone — but only if you already have someone that it makes sense to sext. Definitely don’t reach out to your ex.
11. Or just flirt with someone. A guy from the supermarket. A guy from work. A guy from Tinder. Anyone.
12. Shave your legs, because there’s something sexy about smooth skin.
13. Catch up on whatever you have saved on your DVR while sipping on wine — just make sure to pour it into an actual wineglass instead of the closest coffee mug, so you feel extra classy.
14. Slip into some heels and then take another glance into your mirror, because your legs and your butt are going to look fan-fucking-tastic.
15. Put your old band tee-shirts back in their drawers and wear a revealing nightgown to bed. Or at least some silky, long-sleeved pajamas.
16. Buy one of those bath bombs that you’re always hearing beauty gurus gush about and slip into the tub to relax.
17. Book a massage with your boyfriend or your best friend. Or at least convince one of them to massage you, so you don’t have to waste any money at the spa.
18. The next time you wear a skirt or a dress or even shorts, pair them with fishnets instead of plain black leggings. For whatever reason, those fishnets will make you feel sexier.
19. Find candles in your favorite scent, place them around your bedroom, and light them.
20. Even if you’re not going to leave the house, spray on a flirty perfume. The type that boys always compliment you on.
21. Have sex with someone you’re crazy about.