Thought Catalog

16 Signs That Sex With Your Boyfriend Is Far Too Vanilla For You

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Twenty20, tomainodominique
Twenty20, tomainodominique

1. You’re sick of missionary. And doggy style. Because they’re the only two positions that he ever puts you in. You wish that he would branch out a little more.

2. There’s barely any foreplay and it’s nothing exciting. It’s the same old thing. Things that you’re desensitized to by now.

3. You do find him attractive, but you need more than some eye candy to get turned on. You want to hear his voice whisper dirty things into your ear. To feel his hands run through your hair and yank it. To have more than one of your five senses satisfied.

4. You don’t even enjoy oral anymore, because he always uses the same methods. Since it worked for him once, he figures it will work every time. There’s never any variety in his movements.

5. Sex has become predictable. Not only can you guess what position he’s going to choose, but you can guess when he’s going to initiate sex. It always happens at the same time, in the same way. He never takes you by surprise and throws you against a wall. The kisses only come when you’re in bed together at night.

6. You’d like to try sex toys. Vibrators. Handcuffs. Blindfolds. But he refuses to use any props in the bedroom, because he wants his penis to be enough for you.

7. Sex is nothing like your fantasies. In your fantasies, things are rough. Wild. Passionate. Better.

8. He doesn’t use his hands enough. He doesn’t pin your wrists down or spank you or rub your clitoris. He keeps his hands on the bed and you wish that he would just use them.

9. You also wish that he would make more noise. Ask you what you want. Tell you how good it feels. Or at least moan. But he’s always silent. You can never tell what he’s thinking.

10. Whenever you try to kiss him in public, he pushes you away. He’s not interested in PDA, so public sex is completely off the table.

11. He only kisses you on the lips. Never on the neck. Never on the chest. Only on your face.

12. Whenever you try to sext him or send him a naughty picture, he doesn’t keep the sexy conversation going. He’d rather talk about something else.

13. During sex, you find your mind wandering. You find yourself looking at the clock. You find yourself wishing it was over almost as soon as it starts.

14. When you watch porn or read erotica, the scenes are intense. You’re into some pretty kinky stuff, but you know your boyfriend would never agree to try any of it.

15. You’ve tried to communicate with him, to tell you what you want from him in the bedroom, but he hasn’t changed his ways. He doesn’t want to. Your tastes are just so different.

16. You don’t even want to have sex with him anymore. You’d rather masturbate. TC mark 

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