The expectation: Your first kiss with him will be magical, like something you’d see in a Disney movie. You’ll feel fireworks, a flutter in your stomach, and every other cliche in the book.
The reality: He feels you up while you’re watching Netflix on his couch. He ends up kissing your neck and tearing off your shirt before he even presses his lips against yours for the first time.
The expectation: He’ll actually say the words: “Will you be my girlfriend?” After that, it won’t take long for him to introduce you to his best friends, his parents, and his grandparents. He’ll even be the first one to say, “I love you.”
The reality: He never labels the relationship. You have no idea if you’re his FWB or his serious girlfriend. You’re way too embarrassed to ask, so you try to play detective and figure it out on your own. Of course, you end up reading all of his signs wrong and breaking your own heart.
The expectation: He’ll show up at your front door with roses, walk you over to his car so he can open up the door for you, and take you on a romantic date filled with wine and witty banter.
The reality: He asks you to “hang out,” without filling you in on how he feels about you. You spend way too much time trying to decide if you should dress up like you’re going on a date or dress down to appear casual. When you actually see him, he’s wearing his usual clothes, so you still have no idea if you’re his date, his booty call, or his platonic friend.
The expectation: He’ll walk up to you, a little flustered, and ask you out on a date in person. He’ll spend the entire week planning it, because he wants to make an amazing first impression that’ll convince you to fall for him.
The reality: He sends you a text at the last second asking if you’re still awake without actually writing out the full words and capitalizing when he should. His idea of being a gentleman is adding an emoji at the end of his half-constructed sentences.
The expectation: The cute guy you’ve spent hours flirting with on Tinder will decide to take your relationship to the next level and meet you in person. Even though it’s normally a hookup site, you’ll end up falling head over heels for each other and will have a cute little story about how you first met.
The reality: The hot guy you thought you had a connection with ends up dropping all contact with you. He doesn’t tell you why. He just stops answering your messages, so you have to move on to the next guy who’s bound to do the same exact thing.
The expectation: The sexual tension between you and the guy you’ve been seeing will be so strong that you’ll actually be the one to initiate sex. When it happens, he’ll look you in the eyes, whisper about how beautiful you are, and give you multiple orgasms.
The reality: He doesn’t make you orgasm. In fact, he doesn’t even try. Then, once the sex is over, he leaves without cuddling or ever calling again.
The expectation: When a guy likes you, he’ll compliment you and play with your hair and joke around with you. Eventually, he’ll ask you out on a date and you’ll feel completely comfortable together, because you’re already the best of friends.
The reality: When a guy likes you, he never actually tells you. He doesn’t make his flirting obvious, either. In fact, he’s given you so many backhanded compliments that you assume that he hates you. You have no idea that he’s interested in a relationship, so you two never end up going out on a date, let alone living happily ever after.
The expectation: After the relationship runs its course, you’ll mutually decide to part ways. It won’t be a heartbreaking experience, like most breakups are. You’ll agree to stay friends, and you’ll actually follow through on the promise to keep in touch.
The reality: He cheats on you with another girl, one that you’ve always trusted. He doesn’t apologize for screwing you over. He doesn’t even understand why you’re so angry with him. He actually tries to turn the situation around and blame you for the breakup.