Thought Catalog

20-Somethings — Give Yourselves Some Credit Because You’re Doing Just Fine

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No one has their life figured out. Not even that old classmate of yours who posts pictures of his brand new house and newborn child on Facebook. He might seem put together, but in reality, he doesn’t have a clue what he’s doing, either. We’re all just faking our first attempt at adulthood as best we can. So give yourself some credit. You’re doing better than you think.
Jeff Isy
Jeff Isy

1. A job is a job.

It doesn’t matter if you’re working on Wall Street or taking orders at McDonalds. Don’t let anyone make you feel shitty about earning your own money. You’re not sitting on your ass all day. Spilling grease on your hands and dealing with customer complaints isn’t as glamorous as sitting behind a desk, but it’s still hard fucking work.

2. We’re all huge liars.

Those Facebook friends you’re jealous of aren’t as happy as you think they are. They’re not going to post pictures of their crappy apartment with spiders and peeling wallpaper. They’re going to wait until the one night they visit a five-star restaurant and post pictures of that. They only want the world to see their good side, which is why it always looks like they’re living the high life when you’re really in the same boat.

3. Everyone moves at a different pace.

Yeah, it sucks to be the only one of your friends still stuck in college. Or, even worse, the only one living under your mother’s roof. But you have to do what’s right for you. Take your time and save up your money before you do anything drastic. You don’t want to move out, only to end up back at home the following year.

4. You still have time to figure everything out.

My father always says, “I still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up.” It’s meant to be a joke, but it’s taught me something crucial. If you already know what your passion is, half the battle is over. Be happy you know your final destination, even if your journey is going to be a long one. Of course, even if you don’t know what you want to do yet, you still have time to figure it out. It’s not too late to change career paths or majors.

5. It’s unfair to compare yourself to other people.

It’s sickening to see a teenager win The Voice or create a chart topping album. They’re younger than you, so fuck them for being successful, right? Wrong. You have to stop thinking that their success makes you a failure. Besides, if your life peaks early on, there’s nowhere to go but down. Be happy you’re hiking uphill.

6. Relationships aren’t everything.

If you’ve been dating around, great. If you’ve already found the love of your life, even better. But if you’re single, don’t stress over it. Some people wait until their 30s and 40s to settle down. Some people never settle down at all, and they still lead fulfilling lives. You don’t need a partner to piece you together.

7. The little successes matter, too.

Are you able to cook your own meals? Do your own laundry? Keep a pet or a plant alive? Don’t discount your tiny successes, just because you think that everyone should be able to do those things. Be happy you know how to survive on your own, because some people can’t even fold a shirt.

8. The world is way different than it used to be.

Ignore the relatives who brag about leaving home at sixteen and being married at eighteen. That was back when prices were low and college tuition was reasonable. Now, we have massive debts to pay off that make living on our own close to impossible. And I’m sorry, but we’re not going to rush into marriage before seeing what options are out there.

9. Believe it or not, you’re still super young.

You might feel like you should have your whole life figured out already, because you’re older than you’ve ever been before, but you’re still young. You can’t consider yourself a failure right out of the gate. Wait a few decades before you let the regrets seep in. Right now, you can form your life into anything you want it to be. You’re in complete control.

10. You’re doing better than you realize.

You have to set aside time for work, because it’s the only way you’ll make a living, but you shouldn’t neglect your social life. Give yourself permission to have fun. You deserve it. Start giving yourself some credit, and some well needed time off, because you’re doing fine. TC mark

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