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Wait — what’s that you’re doing? You’re opening a new tab! But you have nowhere to go! Quick, get to weather.com before the self-shaming starts. You’re so devoid of willpower!
We have this tendency to take relatively sparse bits of information and withdraw from them a much, much wider context based mostly on non-concrete stuff like our hopes, expectations, and interpretation of the ‘tone’ of emails, IMs, and texts.
By using “work” as an excuse (in moderation), you will be immune from criticism and familial scorn. Family members will in fact think you’re hardworking, opportunistic, busy, important, and successful, and given the right conditions, actively encourage you to go into your room and get done what you need to get done.
“Am I hungry right now? I think I might be hungry. What’s in the fridge? Hm… doesn’t look like much. I definitely don’t feel like preparing something. A bowl of cereal? Nah, only the end is left — hate that. I should probably get to work. I’m not really hungry. But… I feel like I should snack on something. I need to go to the fridge again, maybe I missed something.”
Weeknights he has very loud get-togethers with the same four people — or the same four types of people, it’s difficult for you to keep track — and one night you hear one of them say “Shouldn’t we be quiet, isn’t your roommate trying to sleep in there?” “Him? He doesn’t matter,” Zack responds.
Party host Joy “has no idea” who invited Scott; thinks Scott is “weird” for coming re Scott and Marissa breaking up as recently as two months ago and Scott’s emotional instability when inebriated and around Marissa as evidenced by episode covered in 28 Aug. minutes.
Minimize eye contact. As a general rule, the ratio of eye contact with your crush to how much you’re crushing on your crush should be inverse. If you must acknowledge your crush, a sideways glance or indirect stare is advised.
The alcohol has run out. Suddenly it feels as if the party is now completely without purpose; as if the meaning of the party was to continually consume alcohol until some end point had been reached. It’s time to go home.
