What’s Your Ultimate Deal Maker? 18 Women Reveal Theirs.


Found on r/AskWomen.

1. No rage

Being really calm, level-headed and capable. A few months ago I dated a guy who was like this and it opened my eyes to how important it was, since I’d previously been in relationships where I was getting yelled at or talked down to a lot. On one of our dates he lost his wallet and was completely calm about it. No rage or yelling or anything, we just finished our date and the next day he went about replacing everything, no fuss or complaining. I don’t know. It sounds so trivial but it was just very reassuring and endearing? Made me like him a lot more.

2. An accent

When I read this question, my first thought was “English accent.”

3. A sense of humor

Kindness and silliness. These are not things that I used to seek out, but overtime I’ve learned that the people who exhibit these qualities tend to be just lovely human beings.

4. The same values

Good communication skills and a sense of humor are my basic requirements for any sort of “deal”, but my ultimate “deal-maker” is if he has values that align with mine.

5. Being nice to everyone

Kindness to everyone and not just to people he is trying to bang.

6. Loves pets

If he has a pet. Not just a pet though. A pet that he is affectionate to and loves, that he treats well.

Or that he loves pets/animals in general and treats my pets well.

7. Not for everyone, but whatever

Vasectomy. Then I know without a doubt he doesn’t want kids too!

8. Passion

Passion. Passion is sexy.

9. A sense of humility

Be able to laugh at yourself.

10. Intelligence

Being passionate and angry about politics in the same way I am. I love someone who is intelligent and knows a lot about one subject or multiple subjects. Also people who care about things. I hate the whole “fuck it” attitude people have these days. Someone who gives a fuck about the inequality and cruelty in the world is amazing. Also friendly people who are interested in what people have to say, and can hold dynamic and interesting conversations.

11. Wanderlust

A sense of adventure. I want to see the world, so I want someone who is excited to come with me and try new things.

12. Passionate without the arrogance

Being passionate but not arrogant. Seeing someone do something really well, even if it’s something stupid, or talk about something they truly love, is a turn on. (If they’re not bragging about it.)

13. They can just deal

Must be able to deal with my chronic awkwardness.

14. Love languages


15. M’lady *tips fedora*

Chivalry/nice manners. When we first started dating my boyfriend would open all doors for me, even the car door, carry everything, say excuse me after burps, and gathered flowers for me. He still opens most doors, when he says excuse me he does it in a high pitched cute voice, picks flowers that I like (when were kayaking he’s the one who reaches out to get them), and carries my heavy things. He’ll even hold my purse if I ask.

16. Facial hair


17. Curiosity and a penchant for being goofy

I like predictability. Have some sense of certainty when it comes to one’s behavior and having a general idea of how they react to things in general is necessary for me to be comfortable around someone. Kindheartedness, curiosity, critical thinking and goofiness are also desirable traits.

18. Let’s be silly

Someone I can be really silly with. I am a silly and goofy person with my partners, and it’s such a turn on when they not only enjoy my silliness but throw their own back at me! Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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