22. Maybe that’s why
My husband’s aunt wore a silver sequined pantsuit to my outdoor wedding. She got smashed and started singing very, very loudly. There was no dance floor or karaoke or anything. We just had a stereo in the corner playing classical music.
She even stood in front of me at one point and sang (well, more like yelled lyrics on the top of her lungs) and when her husband tried to pull her away, she started screaming about how nobody pays attention to her anymore.
I was the best man at my best friend’s wedding last August. Overall, it went off smoothly, and to this day, by buddy has no idea about half of the stuff that I did to try to keep everything running smoothly… The highlight was definitely this one couple in the wedding, though…
One of the groomsmen was a dude that I didn’t know. Dude was obsessed with himself (his hair, his clothes, etc). This guy had recently acquired a new gf, and they were hopelessly “in love”, “perfect for each other”, and kept talking about how they were gonna get married “because they just knew it was right and would work out”. Kinda insulting to the bride and groom who had carefully dated, counseled, and planned, but w/e. My buddy saw fit to put this guy in the wedding. Not my show.
The real icing on the cake came when this guy suddenly insisted that his gf was going down to Lake Tahoe with the rest of the wedding party. It was a two day drive, space was at a premium, very small wedding, only family and super-close friends invited. Nonetheless, this guy brings it up, cool as can be, the day before we car-pool down and just acts like it’s a given that she is coming. I don’t know this guy, and, like I said, it’s my buddy’s show, so I let those in the know handle it. My buddy talks to him, the dude throws a tantrum and says (among other things) that my buddy isn’t really his friend if he won’t let this guy’s gf come. My buddy finds himself in a pinch, because there is supposed to be the same number of groomsmen as bridesmaids, and there’s no way he can find another groomsman on such short notice… So he relents and tells this guy that his gf can come…
This girl has to be the most selfish/arrogant person that I have ever met. We were down in Lake Tahoe for a week before the wedding… In that course of time, this girl (who is little more than a remote acquaintance) gets in multiple spats with the bride, tells people preparing for the wedding that they are doing everything wrong multiple times (stuff like, “oh, you’re folding the napkins all wrong! Do it this way!”), and single-handedly caused more work and problems than any other individual in the wedding party. I had several run-ins with her in which I inevitably told her that I was going to do it the way the bride and groom wanted it, and that ‘if she wanted to bitch about things, she should get her own damn wedding’. She took this opportunity to go around to everyone who would listen and tell them what an asshole I was.
The groomsmen that is attached to girl is no saint either. I repeatedly found myself being the only one around the groom that week. We spent hours and hours, day after day making table settings, folding brochures, preparing gifts, etc while this guy is off with his gf (usually following the bride and her bridesmaids around while they did other things). By a day or two before the wedding, both the groom and I were both pretty fed up.
Anyway, day of the dress rehearsal, I’m all dressed up in my suit, all of the bridesmaids are wearing matching pale purple dresses, and this girl shows up… She’s wearing a reddish purple tight-tight dress and way to much make-up. We’re confused at first, when she asks us where she needs to be, but, one horrifying revelation later, we realize that she fully intends to be in the wedding! Several last straws, raised voices, and a fair bit of drama later, she calls the bride a nasty name and flounces out of there. That night, she shows up to the celebratory dinner and acts like nothing happened. Her bf, btw, has continued to vanish off and on this entire time and will take no responsibility for this terror that he demanded we bring along.
The day of the wedding, four things stand out in my mind.