24 Things Only Really Crazy People Believe In
By hoK leahciM
1. Brain power
“You use only x% of your brain!”
2. Entrapment
If you ask a cop if they’re a cop, and they say no, they can’t arrest you for anything after that, or it would be entrapment.
3. Chemicals are bad for you
Something without “chemicals” is automatically good for you. Everything is fucking chemicals!
4. Bad world, bad decisions
The world is a more dangerous place, and getting more dangerous.
You are less likely to die through violence (war or crime) now than at any point in history.
5. Food pyramid
6. Babies
If you touch a baby bird or an egg the mother will abandon it. Parents made this lie up so that children wouldn’t fuck with the eggs and kill the birds or bring home diseases.
7. I don’t even…
If you aren’t for something you are against it.
8. Anti-Evolution
“If we evolved from monkeys, why are there still monkeys?”
Common ancestor, people.
9. Einstein
Einstein was bad at math in school. No he wasn’t. He had taught himself integral and differential calculus by the age of 15. It is just something that is used as a motivational tool to give bad students hope.
10. Wait, what
That your blood in your body is blue until it contacts the oxygen in the air and turns red.
11. CS majors can fix anything computer
That I, having studied computer science, can fix your computer/iphone.
SQL? Sure, but why is half of the screen green? I don’t know. Sounds like a hardware problem.
12. Yo, knowledge is power tho
That teaching teenagers about contraceptives will flip a switch in their brain and make them start having sex before they’re ready.
13. No, you idiot, you hold down B
That pressing B a bunch of times gives your Pokeball a higher chance of success.
14. Surprise, excess sugar makes you fat too
That because something’s ‘fat free’ means it won’t make you fat.
15. Ginger extinction
That gingers are going extinct because being ginger is a recessive trait.
We’re gonna stick around. Deal with it.
16. Y’all is sheep
That vaccines cause autism. CLICK HERE FOR MORE.
17. Only if you have Barry Zuckerkorn as your lawyer
You can’t charge a husband and wife for the same crime.
18. Climate change deniers
That “global warming” (actually called climate change now, btw) means earth should actually keep getting noticeably hotter on a day to day basis.
People who can’t be bothered to take 5 to 10 minutes to brush up on what climate change is, how it actually works and affects us, etc. should not be allowed to make idiot statements like “It’s cold out today! so much for global warming!”
19. Calling things OCD
That OCD is just keeping things tidy. That’s not OCD, that’s fucking perfectionism.
20. Size of Velociraptor
That Velociraptors were as big as they were in Jurassic Park, they were tiny little bastards!
21. Choosing homosexuality
Homosexuality is a choice.
22. Stop telling me that I’m going to catch a cold with wet hair, mom
Going out in the cold/rain will make you sick.
It’s not the rain/cold that will make you sick. It can slightly lower your immune system defenses, but it’s still germs that make you sick.
Also that you need antibiotics for colds. No, you do not.
23. People actually say this
“If you go into therapy, you’re just avoiding responsibility for your problems.”
Going into therapy means taking responsibility for your problems. Alfred Adler established that a central goal of psychology is to help others take more responsibility. That was in 1934.
24. Welp
That England will win the World Cup.