1. Computer engineering

Tons of chicks, just not very many.

2. Biochemistry

Spend 4 Years Aspiring to Discover the Cure for Cancer, and the Rest of Your Life Manufacturing Shampoo.

3. Biochemistry

“I went to a party, once.”

4. Archaeology

if you don’t know what it is, it’s probably ceremonial.

5. Archaeology

One rock: just a rock. two rocks: a wall.

6. Information Technology

Let me google that for you

7. Information Technology

Did you try turning it off and on again?

8. Computer Science

(For a straight girl): The odds are good, but the goods are odd.

9. Computer Science

Well… it works on my system…

10. Chemistry

Where alcohol IS a solution.

11. Political Science

Your opinion is wrong.

12. Aerospace Engineering

It actually is rocket science.

13. Engineering

The art of figuring out which parameters you can safely ignore.

14. Electrical engineering

Where everything’s imaginary!

15. Philosophy

Think about it…

16. Communications

We’ll teach you everything you need to know about convincing your friends that your degree is actually meaningful.

17. Dental Hygienist

Something to do until you get knocked up.

18. Speech Pathology

We have ways of making you talk.

19. Linguistics

Studied 17 languages, am fluent in none of them.

20. Structural Engineering

Because architects don’t know what physics is.

21. Criminal Justice

We’re here because of Law & Order reruns.

22. Photography

It’s worth a shot.

23. Statistics

Where everything’s made up and the numbers don’t matter.

24. Anthropology

It’ll get you laid, but it won’t get you paid!

25. Zoology

Because you can’t major in kittens.

26. Psychology

Good luck doing anything until you get your Master’s!

27. History

History may repeat itself, but you definitely will.

28. Film

Forks on the left, knives on the right.

29. Physics

Everything you learned last week was wrong.

30. Creative Writing

Because job security is for pussies.

31. Latin

Because useful is overrated.

32. Finance

Accounting was too hard.

33. Accounting

Selling your soul for money.

34. English

Learn how to sound intelligent while being too drunk for conversation!

35. Astronomy

I don’t give a fuck about your “sign.”

36. Architecture

We do models.

37. Pharmacy

No touching involved.

38. Economics

Would you like me to put that into a chart for you?

39. Nursing

While that answer is correct, it is not the most correct.