I was out fossil hunting in a wash after a thunderstorm the night before. I figured it had to uncover a bit of stuff down in the streambed. I found this.
- Went on a 5 day gold panning trip with a couple buddies of mine. We drove 6 hours down unused logging roads, we’re talking totally overgrown roads with trees having to be removed from the road to pass. We saw not one human the entire time we were out there, except for on the 3rd night… at 3am. We are sitting around the fire, drinking some beers, swatting at bugs, and shooting the shit when I hear a something. I look over and notice some light in the trees. What the… It’s a truck, driving up the logging road we had cleared ourselves to get there, at 3am. The truck gets up to where we are, pulls into where we made camp (a small turn off spot for logging trucks), sits there for 10sec while we all kinda stare in shock at one another, I get up and start walking towards the truck to say hello and ask what the heck they are doing out at 3am on abandoned logging roads when the truck just backs up, turns around, and drives off the way it came… The guy(s) just drove 6 hours down logging roads all through the night, sees us and leaves without saying a word… We are all sitting there going, “uhhh what the fuck?” We all figured this guy was driving down the road, getting out and coming back to kill us in our sleep. Next morning we head down the road and nothing, they didn’t set up camp or anything… Just left. We figured we were likely camped out near a grow-op for one of the gangs (Hells Angels most likely) and they were coming out to check who had come out to their spot, or they were there to pick the crop in the middle of the night.
- One time driving down a bunch of logging roads at night (4am?), looking for a campsite we had driven past, we took a wrong turn and drove right into a drug operation cashing out the crop. We turn a corner and BLAM flood lights and like 15 guys all staring at us in the middle of the forest down logging roads. We just sorta turned around and got the fuck outta there. (Hu… this is a lot like the first story except I’m the creep in the truck! Ha!)
- One time I was out hiking in the back woods with a buddy of mine. Waaaaaaay out there with nobody in sight. In the evening I start to gather some wood for a campfire that evening and I pull this stick, out of the trees. Stick is maybe 5ft long 3″ wide? It looks like a nice walking stick, straight and mostly smooth… Then I notice that one end of the stick is REALLY smooth, like it’s been whittled by someone. I’m thinking, oh wow what are the odds of that! It IS a walking stick, someone has carved a smooth handle on one end! NOPE It’s not a handle. It’s a dick. Someone had carved the end of this stick into a dick. Someone was fucking the forest. Literally. This wasn’t some crude carving just FYI. This was a work. Like the person put HOURS into carving it, and was very good at carving. This was a 6″ dong carved with love and feeling, right down to it having “bulging” veins and other fine details…. WHAT THE FUCK. So I took the dickstick back to camp and threatened to poke my buddy with it. Yelling that the forest was going to give him tree AIDS.