I’m a pilot. Obviously the last few days have been a zoo, and Chicago has been hellish. We were going from Chicago to Milwaukee and back and then we were done with a four-day trip, so we were definitely wanting to get on with it and go home.
We were all boarded and waiting for the de-ice truck to come spray us because it was snowing. After waiting for over an hour for the truck, they finally spray us down and we start pushing back. As we are pushing, the flight attendant calls up and tells us there’s a lady that wants to get off the airplane. We tell her we can’t, so the lady then tells the flight attendant that her baby is having a medical emergency and has to get off. Fine. We pull back up to the gate and let her off, the baby looks fine mind you, and ask her if she needs paramedics. She denies medical attention and refused to take the baby to the clinic that is literally 50 feet away.
They had checked bags, so we had to call rampers to dig through the cargo hold to find their bags. Finally, we had them off and we were getting ready to go again, about 2 hours late at this point. As we were getting ready to close the door, the gate agent ran up and said that when the lady found out that we were the last flight up to Milwaukee, she begged to get back on the airplane and come with us. The captain and I looked at each other in shock, told the gate agent there was no way in hell she was getting back on the airplane, and got out of there.
TL;DR – Lady feigns her child’s illness to get off the airplane. After delaying the flight, she wants to get back on and come with us.
My dad was on a flight to got somewhere for vacation. Everyone was well into the flight when this guy in a nice suit had this liquid pouring onto him from the overhead cabin. The guy screamed out, “WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?!” and without missing a beat this little old lady with a thick southern accent says, “Das my Shrimp!” (Mind you this was pre 9/11, so she was somehow able to get frozen shrimp on a plane.) Rough day for that guy…
I once got a seat next to a 6’6″, 400 lb, line-backer, mammoth of a fat man. The arm rests could not go down. His leg was literally on top of mine and my torso hung out into the isle. After takeoff, I get out of the seat and stood in the back of the plane (until final approach). The nice flight attendant said, “sorry about that. I don’t know why they put the two biggest guys next to each other.” It was then that I realized I was the second FATTEST person on the plane. :( I have since lost weight.