My roommate freshman year got completely hammered, came back to the room around 1 in the morning, and accused me of stealing the pudding in her fridge that she had ate an hour before she went out. She waited until I fell asleep and then stabbed me in the arm with one of those clicky pencils…I had to go to the hospital to get it cleaned/stitched. She got kicked out.
Walked in on him — room full of lit candles — masturbating furiously on bed covered in rose petals.
Apparently, some girl was supposed to come over and she did not show. The image still haunts my dreams.
I woke up once to my roommate having a wet dream. He woke up shortly after. We briefly made eye contact, he quickly got dressed, went to class, and we never spoke of it again.
My roommate was a jersey guido. Told me over FB that he’d bring a “sick speaker system.”
He only brought a subwoofer.