Life will always be about choices. The ones you choose to take and the ones you choose to leave. Make a choice and don’t look back, make it without a doubt in your body and let the rest unravel in due time. There is no such thing as “not knowing” what to do, or what you want, because in reality you know. You always know.
Deep down in that heart of yours, you know what’s good for you, and you know what’s bad.
Your heart knows what it wants, what it needs to be healthy and living but you choose to feed it lies about what you think is good for you. That is poisonous. That is toxic. You are killing yourself without noticing how, without noticing that there are 1,440 minutes in one day for you to slow down, take a step back and look at all the things you have overcome in the last year. You did that. Not your heartbreak, or the people that put you down in the past. You overcame the obstacles, and you had hope in yourself to do better, you had faith in yourself to love more, and to decide that your heartbreak wasn’t going to turn you into a cold, distant person. You do not owe anything to anyone but yourself, and that’s what your heart wants to hear.
Your heart wants to hear you fight for your happiness, and make sure that you don’t change those quirky things that it loves about you for anyone. It wants you to grow with it, not apart from it because of someone you lost. It needs you to reassure it that you are stronger than the flames that burned you. That you stay that same kind hearted person you were before you were broken, before you knew what pain was. That even through all the heartache, you keep going, and you keep waking up every morning ready to combat whatever is placed in front of you. There will be horrible days, and in those cry if you need to for as long as you want even if your eyes get puffy, because sometimes it just feels good. Your heart is doing it’s best, and it is not a crime to feel misunderstood, or emotional.
You and your heart are a team. One without the other is deemed to repeatedly see destruction, but together you can be the light that you might have lost along the way while thinking too much, or giving your heart out to the wrong person. Don’t let the world destroy you, don’t let the choices you made in the past determine who you are, because if you listen to your heart it speaks. It will tell you that what you did in the past was what you thought was the right thing to do at that moment, and nothing else exists after that. Accept that you do what you do for your heart, and no one else.
You love so hard, you love so fast and that is perfectly fine, your heart is not foolish, you are simply human.
Ask God to strengthen your heart, when you feel like it’s not there. You are not going crazy. It is there. It always has been.
So place your hand over your heart and listen to it beat by beat, follow its tempo, and say “I’m alive” out loud. Scream it, and believe it. Repeat, “I will be kind to myself”, “I will be patient with myself”, and “I will never give up on my happiness”, because that’s what your heart wants to hear you sing. It wants to hear you acknowledge it from wherever you are right now, because it has been taken for granted for too long. Remember, your heart is a heart of gold.
It is a rare and divine beauty that not many people get to see.
That those who have, cannot get rid of it easily because your light shone through every piece of them. That is what you must never forget. Let your heart love those people, don’t push them out in hate, or envy. It is not worth your time, or the beats of your heart. Believe me, your heart is much more than that. Your heart is yours and yours only, and it is the most precious thing you will ever carry.