14 ESFPs Explain The One Thing They Wish Others Understood About Their Personality

ESFPs are the lively, charismatic entertainers of the MBTI. While this type is known for their fun-loving attitude, there’s infinitely more to the ESFP personality than meets the eye. This week on my MBTI Facebook page, I asked ESFPs what they wished the other types understood about them. Here’s what they had to say.
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amyjhumphries

1. “Just because we are the “Party Type” doesn’t mean we don’t value quiet time and having deep conversations! ESFP doesn’t equal shallow!”

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2.
“We enjoy deep conversations. However the things you tell us we may feel the need to fix ourselves and to carry around as if it’s our own problem, which becomes quite overwhelming very fast. I love deep talks about your problems though! The more real and vulnerable you are with me the cooler I feel!”

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3. “Just because I like the spotlight and being the center of attention doesn’t mean my confidence is quite as high as it seems.”

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4. “I wish others could see how our intense focus on people allows us to use that information and experience strategically. It’s a type of intelligence that is unique to us!”

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5. “We’re not stupid. At all. I’m currently in medical school and most of the people here are S’s. Taking things in in a literal, concrete way does not equal incompetence. Personally, I don’t want someone philosophizing about my heart when it stops beating on the operating table. I want someone with a quick reaction time there to save my life.”

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6. “ESFPs are definitely energetic and love to let lose and party, but while they’re typically described as the life of the party, I think they’re really just very social people. Rather than being the center of attention at big parties, I’m usually all over the place having one-on-one or group conversations with as many people as possible because I love talking to people, catching up with friends, and getting to know new people. We do enjoy the spotlight, but it’s not all about that or about partying- it’s the genuine love of communicating and connecting with as many people as possible (and that doesn’t mean having lots of acquaintances versus a few close friends- ESFPs take their friendships very seriously, and because of their social nature, they have many close friends who are more than just acquaintances).”

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7. “Though we thrive off social interaction, we aren’t the type that has to be around people 24/7. I really enjoy spending time alone and I’m also completely comfortable doing things like eating out or walking somewhere by myself.”

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8. “We’re not all slutty/promiscuous. I’m a serious relationship girl and I always have been. Just because we love people doesn’t mean we all sleep around.”

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9. “I feel like ESFP’s have been painted as unintelligent party animals. It’s true that I don’t love theological ideas or debating about current politics but ESFP’s are smarter than they let off. We have a unique social and emotional intelligence that is different from other types. I’m very aware of my surroundings and am often the first one to pick up on someone’s emotions (maybe even before they have processed those feelings themselves!) and I can react quickly to diffuse many uncomfortable situations because of this. I would rather be socially smart than book smart any day.”

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10. “We’re really not that shallow!”

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11. “ESFPs are some of the most creative people you’ll ever meet but we’re never really given credit for that. There’s a stereotype that all artistic and creative people are these tortured introverts but that’s not always true. I paint for a living and I’m a HUGE extrovert!”

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12. “ESFPs are often cast as attention hungry and self centered people. Although we love to party and don’t mind the attention, ESFPs truly want to make OTHERS happy and will often put other people’s needs and wants above their own in order to do so.”

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13. “We may not show it but our feelings get hurt really easily. Even though we seem really confident, we take personal jokes to heart and don’t always brush things off very easily. Please play nice with us!”

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14. “We are NOT selfish people! Yes we like the spotlight and that might make us seem full of ourselves but really we just like to make people laugh and make them happy. So many of us grow up to be social workers and counsellors and teachers, etc. At the end of the day we really just love people and want to help them!” TC mark

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