ENFJs are the organized, people-savvy nurturers who serve as the glue of almost any group of friends. You know that totally together, super popular person you wish you could hate but can’t because they’re so genuinely nice? Probably an ENFJ. This extroverted type feeds off the energy of other and derives their greatest joy from seeing those around them thrive. The only downside:ENFJs get so wrapped up in the lives of those around them that they often forget about their own needs. If you have an ENFJ in your life, here are a few things they most likely need reminding of.
1. You deserve to have feelings of your own.
ENFJS draw their greatest joy from the happiness of others, which means that their own feelings are often put on the back burner. No matter what’s going on with those around them, ENFJs need to remember that their own feelings are important – and that they ought to be nurtured just as carefully as the feelings of those around them.
2. Not all decisions are set in stone.
ENFJs take decision-making very seriously. They don’t fancy the thought of backtracking on a choice, especially if that choice involves a commitment to someone else. This occasionally means that they will stay in bad situations longer than necessary.
Every ENFJ needs the occasional reminder that it’s okay to change their minds. Re-evaluating our priorities is a natural part of being human in this ever-changing world, and nobody should feel guilty for exercising that right. In the long run, a change of plans might even work out best for everyone.
3. Some people only learn the hard way.
There is nothing more painful for an ENFJ than being around a struggling friend who will not accept help. At these times, it is important to remember that the process of coming to a decision is often just as important for loved ones as actually reaching it is. While an ENFJ may genuinely see the best path for someone they are close to, supporting someone as they find their own way can ultimately be more helpful than simply pointing them in the right direction.
4. It is not your personal responsibility to solve everyone’s problems.
ENFJs take the weight of everyone else’s’ issues on their shoulders — which can be a heavy burden to bear. ENFJs need to remember that taking on a problem does not mean it is their fault if things do not work out — any help they give is simply a bonus.
5. You are probably doing more than you’re being given credit for.
ENFJs thrive off validation, but don’t always receive it from those around them. When this happens, ENFJs tend to get down on themselves and believe the lack of feedback is because they are not trying hard enough. Nine times out of ten, this is not the case. Every ENFJ needs to remember that not being thanked does not always mean not being appreciated — chances are they’re silently appreciated every single day.
6. You, more than anyone else, deserve your own care and concern.
ENFJs are almost always the strong “Mama or Papa Bears” of any group. They are constantly watching out for their friends, but not always monitoring their own well being. ENFJs need to remember that their own health and happiness is just as important as that of the people they protect – after all, a group of cubs is lost without their healthy Mama bear.