One call. It just takes One call or one chat to rouse you into action to be there for somebody. Without second thought, without thinking about your own commitments and schedules and responsibilities, you always, always come for their aid. Everyone can rely on you. They feel secured that you will handle everything. But when it’s your time to rely on them, you felt like a burden.
You’re down for anything. And they seek your company, all of them. Because you know how to listen, and you know how to make them listen. You’re the shoulder to cry on, the candle in the dark and all those other cliché lines about the best friend that one seeks during their darkest days.
But all those lines cannot calm your own storms, all those cliché consolatory lines that supposed to make you feel good about helping and being a good friend will not hush your shivering frame when you silently cry at your darkest days.
They always dismiss your call for help with, “You’re strong, you can do it,” “You’re tough, you can handle that, I’ve seen you handle difficult things,” These lines are not motivational. These lines say they are too busy to be bothered by your issues and problems.
Stop being that friend who is always ready for anyone who asked for help or for company. Tell them that if they really wanted this friendship with you, they need understand that they are SUPPOSED TO BE THERE for you too.
Stop getting out of your way to accommodate a friend in need. Tell them you could help, but they need to understand you have a life too. A life you’re struggling too. A struggle none even lends a hand or an ear.
Stop making them feel important, while they treat you like and option. Only remembering your name and your phone number when there is no one for them. Tell them you are not a Letter in a multiple choice question. That you need to be prioritize too. To be heard and to be considered. That you need them too.
Start being the best friend of yourself by saying NO, and not feeling guilty for declining to help. Because they have decline countless when you are the one asking.
You are the Best of friend for them. It’s time they should equal that, unless they don’t really want the friendship. Then it’s better to burn the bridge now.
It’s time to be a good friend to yourself.